Great Memes, Cont.

H/T Scissorhead calcurmudgeon

Now THAT is my kinda cat.

Posted in cats, Great Memes | 1 Comment

‘Oops,’ Said Faceberg

So lifelike.

I’m shocked. Shocked, I say:

“SANTA FE, N.M. (AP) — A New Mexico jury found Tuesday that social media conglomerate Meta is harmful to children’s mental health and in violation of state consumer protection law.”

“The landmark decision comes after a nearly seven-week trial. Jurors sided with state prosecutors who argued that Meta — which owns Instagram, Facebook and WhatsApp — prioritized profits over safety.”

Wait. What? A sociopathic tech-bro billionaire’s company “prioritized profits over safety.” Say it ain’t so.

“The jury determined Meta violated parts of the state’s Unfair Practices Act on accusations the company hid what it knew about about the dangers of child sexual exploitation on its platforms and impacts on child mental health.”

Oh, so they knew that they were doing it, too? Child Sexual Exploitation, so… aren’t they saying that Meta was protecting pedophiles over protecting children, you know, for money?

“The jury agreed with allegations that Meta made false or misleading statements and also agreed that Meta engaged in “unconscionable” trade practices that unfairly took advantage of the vulnerabilities of and inexperience of children.”

Let’s cut to the chase:

“Jurors found there were thousands of violations, each counting separately toward a penalty of $375 million.”

For Faceberg, this penalty is like a rounding error and will get put on the books as the cost of doing business in the annual report; it probably will not be broken out. This $375M Amero penalty is a slap on the wrist.

“In addition, more than 40 state attorneys general have filed lawsuits against Meta, claiming it’s contributing to a mental health crisis among young people by deliberately designing Instagram and Facebook features that are addictive.”

If 40 AGs (yeah that means Red States, too!) are coming for Meta, that’s a pretty good indicator that Social Media is a dangerous distribution channel that needs regulation; that’s what Faceberg and the rest of the bros are fighting.

Posted in Bastards, Billionaire Bastards, Epstein Class, Facebook or Faceberg, Instagram, Meta, Our Failed Social Media, The Broligarchs | 1 Comment

Midday Palate Cleanser

“Pass the salt,” the Maine Coon said, licking her chops and staring at the hoomin. “I bet it tastes like chicken.”

Posted in cats, Palate Cleansers | Leave a comment

Shallow Graves For Shallow People

The Bulwark Announces Another Great Idea!

 

The Bulwark proves to us again that they are skin-deep allies:

“Thirst Traps Over Think Tanks: Dems Want Hotter Candidates on the Ballot”

“THE DEBATE AMONG DEMOCRATS over how to win back disaffected voters has touched on virtually every aspect of campaigns, policy, and politics. But what if the answer is so primal, so shallow, so inherently biological that to hear it out loud would make you uncomfortably chuckle?”

“What if the key to winning was to run more “hot” people?”

There’s a lot I would suggest we change before I got so far down on the list that I started hitting the Hot or Not reality teevee show of the early 2000s, and that would include updating Shakespeare: “First, we kill all…the Campaign Consultants.”

Posted in 2026 Pie Fight, Shallow graves for shallow people | 7 Comments

About Those YUGE Polymarket Bets Yesterday, Like No One’s Ever Seen Before!

“Some cuts may be necessary.”
(H/T Scissorhead Purplehead)

Professor Krugman saw the same thing we did the other day:

“Over the weekend Donald Trump threatened dire vengeance on Iran unless its government opened the Strait of Hormuz within 48 hours, a deadline that would expire Monday evening in Washington. Specifically, he announced that the U.S. would begin bombing power plants — plants that supply electricity to Iran’s civilian population — unless the Strait was cleared.”

“But at 7:05 AM Monday Trump called the whole thing off — for five days, he said, but many people are assuming that the threatened action, which would have been a massive war crime, is now off the table.”

“The reason for the about-face, he claimed, was that the U.S. was engaged in productive negotiations with Iranian officials — although this seems to have come as news to the Iranians, who denied that any such negotiations are taking place. Sad to say, in this case, as I tried to explain yesterday, the fanatical, brutal Iranian regime is more credible than the president of the United States. Is he lying or living in a fantasy world? Neither possibility is comforting.”

“But in any case, Trump’s sudden climb-down was startling. Who could have seen this coming?”

[TACO…]

“The answer is, the person or people who bought large quantities of stock market futures and sold large quantities of oil futures around 15 minutes before Trump’s announcement.”

The Krug then points us to CNBC:

“At around 6:50 a.m. in New York, S&P 500 e-Mini futures trading on the CME recorded a sharp and isolated jump in volume, breaking from an otherwise subdued premarket backdrop. With thin liquidity typical of early trading hours, the sudden burst stood out as one of the largest volume moments of the session up to that point.”

“A similar pattern was observed in oil markets. West Texas Intermediate May futures also saw a noticeable pickup in trading activity at roughly the same time, with a distinct volume spike interrupting otherwise quiet conditions.”

Krugman notes that there was “no major news items — no major publicly available news items — to drive sudden big market transactions.” In other words, it was someone with insider information.

Then Krugman drops the bomb (back to his Substack):

When officers of a company or people close to them exploit confidential information for personal financial gain, that’s insider trading — which is illegal. But we have another word for situations in which people with access to confidential information regarding national security — such as plans to bomb or not to bomb another country — exploit that information for profit. That word is “treason.”

Now, it’s one thing for me, a Cheeto-stained wretch —lowly and squat— to post things from their mom’s basements, it’s quite another when a Nobel Memorial Prize in Economic Sciences-winning economist and verily trusted pundit proclaims it.

Anyway, here’s his reasoning:

“Why is profiting from insider information about national security decisions effectively a form of treason? First, it’s hard to think of a more fundamental principle for officials we entrust with important decisions, especially those that involve national security, that they or people they know should not be allowed to exploit their positions for personal gain.”

“Second, financial trading based on what should be closely held secrets reveals information to current or potential foreign adversaries. To exaggerate a bit, but only a bit, who needs to bribe agents within the government, or recruit them with honey traps, when you can infer the same information by keeping track of transactions on futures markets?”

“Finally, there isn’t that big a gap between using knowledge of national secrets to make lucrative financial trades and simply selling those secrets to the highest bidder. Once you’re breached the line that says you shouldn’t profit personally from access to information that is or should be highly classified, the line between trading based on state secrets and selling those secrets directly is a blurry one.”

“In fact, I’d very much like to know exactly who was making those trades yesterday morning. Were they people directly in the know, or billionaires/traders who paid people in the know for tips?”

And I’m sure our AG Ursula, er, Pam Bondi will hop right on it and give Ka$sh Patel an extra Milk Bone if he finds out.

I would start the search directly with Junior Mints, but that’s just me. With the possible exception of the second daughter What’s-Her-Name, there is not a single member of The Orange 🤡 Crime Family that wouldn’t stiff the country for the price of a cheeseburger.

And I wouldn’t be a damn bit surprised if it didn’t start at the top with the Big Cheese, hisself.

Related, but maybe too narrow:

Sens. Adam Schiff (D-CA) and John Curtis (R-UT) introduced a bill to curb sports betting on government-regulated prediction market platforms, such as Kalshi and Polymarket. “Too many young people in Utah are getting exposed to addictive sports betting and casino-style gaming contracts that belong under state control, not under federal regulators,” Curtis said in a statement. It’s the first bipartisan legislation aimed at reining in prediction markets.

Posted in Bastards, blood sucking leeches, Crime and Non-Punishment, The Orange 🤡 Crime Family | 7 Comments

Maybe Hair Füror Took The Elderly and Infirm Exemption to Vote By Mail?

Isn’t this what the SAVE act is supposed to prevent?

Trump casts a mail-in ballot in Florida special election as he tries to sharply limit absentee voting

 

President Donald Trump voted in Tuesday’s state House special election by mail even as he suggested on Monday that “mail-in voting means mail-in cheating.”

“You know, brought to my attention today that we’re the only country that does mail-in voting,” Trump said at a roundtable on crime in Memphis. “Mail-in voting means mail-in cheating. I call it mail-in cheating, and we got to do something about it all.”

According to Palm Beach County records, Trump voted in the special election for House District 87, which includes his Mar-a-Lago residence, by mail earlier this month. Trump also voted by mail in the primary for the election in January.

Of course, he has the financial means to travel there to vote (and not just play golf), so why doesn’t he put his money where his anus-stylized mouth is? Maybe he’s taking the elderly and infirm exemption?

Meanwhile, our illegitimate and corrupt SCOTUS appeared skeptical about allowing mail-in ballots in several states to be counted if they arrive past Election Day.

A ruling is expected in June, just in time to monkey with the 2026 Pie Fight. Get your plan in place, because Republicans don’t want YOU to vote.

Posted in 2026 Pie Fight, corrupt and illegitimate and opaque SCOTUS, Floriduh, Hair Füror The Orange 🤡, Vote Suppression, voting | 1 Comment

The Morning Snicker

Perfect. No notes.

(Remember: point and laugh at the fascists. They take themselves seriously.)

Posted in snark | 4 Comments

Great Memes, Cont.

H/T Scissorhead Skinny-D

Why are Kaiju not helping Hair Füror? Whatever happened to professional courtesy?

Posted in snark | 11 Comments

‘You Keep Using That Word’

“I do not think ‘imminent’ means what you think it means.”

Sen. Roger Marshall: "I think that this imminent threat has been more than imminent. It's been there for decades."

Aaron Rupar (@atrupar.com) 2026-03-23T21:15:53.087Z

Usually Marshall (R- Terrible Tornado Kingdom of Kansastan) just makes an ass out of himself at Town Hall meetings, so this is an ambitious step-up!

Posted in People Dumber than Dolphins, What’s the Matter With Kansas NOW? | 8 Comments

Open Tab: The Yutes of Today

A metal sign that reads, “Unattended children will be given an energy drink and taught to swear"The Journos at NOTUS over the weekend:

It’s a long-standing allegation that Washington is a gerontocracy — a place where disproportionate power is wielded by people who, because of their age, struggle to understand the lives and views of young Americans. Maybe our latest NOTUS Perspectives forum can help bridge that divide: We asked 22 college students and recent graduates from across the country to write short pieces identifying one political or social trend among young people that Washington badly misunderstands. Their compelling and, in many cases, surprising answers are here and below. (A shout-out to my colleague Anusha Mathur, who spearheaded this project.)

And they got some really interesting answers, but this one really stood out to me (emphasis mine):

People in Washington wrongly think my generation is disengaging from politics. Surveys show that younger Americans are deeply dissatisfied with how the political system works and their overall trust in democratic institutions is eroding; but taking that data at face value is reductive. What we’ve seen recently at The Daily Pennsylvanian tells a different story: Students are engaging in political discussions when the impact on them is clear.

Over the last two years, Penn’s campus has been subjected to unprecedented political scrutiny and witnessed levels of activism not seen since the Vietnam War. During that time, we’ve experienced higher-than-ever traffic — not necessarily on high-level national stories, but on pieces about policy changes that have tangible and immediate impacts on students’ day-to-day lives. Young people want to know how national issues affect them and their communities. The stories they’re tuning out are the ones from an unrelenting news cycle that don’t answer those questions.

It is wrong for politicians to assume that young people are uniformly disengaged. Instead, it is more likely they have failed to show why their message matters.

That last Graf is pure gold, and sums up the problem with our messaging (to EVERYONE, not just the yutes) as neatly as I have ever heard it.

Posted in 2026 Pie Fight, Great Messaging | 6 Comments