Monday, September 27, 2010

CANNOT. STUDY.

all i want to do right now is to play floorball with them downstairs. the squeaky shoes on court floor and the sound of blade connecting with ball come through the computer room door and drilling away at my resolve.

i feel like im under quarantine :(

xinyi cartwheeled in the rain at 01:49

meiqi: did you open the mango bulk?
debbie: need to top up meh? still got so much!
meiqi: isn't it finishing?
debbie: it's still got half left!
meiqi: YAHH isn't that finishing?!
debbie: why are you so pessimistic!!

hurhur aptly applying the glass is half-empty/half-full analogy, good job.

my reappearance at dempsey after a six-month long (or something like that) hiatus didn't have that usual comforting familiarity. it took a while for the gears to start going, just needed abit of greasing. and since it was f1 night our theme of the night was singtel grid girls hurhur. and there were customers that made me happy (: that and the people i work with remind me of why i keep going back to this job.



kevin says i smell of icecream and waffles everytime i come back from work.

xinyi cartwheeled in the rain at 01:41

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

and just like that, another chapter of my life in kr closes.

honestly like i said during the stepping-down/handover speech (or whatever u call it), it feels a little overdue. it feels like it should all have been said right after DU, like at post-prod party or something. because that felt like the peak of the entire term, everything culminating to those two nights, till the final curtain call.

dance comm, a committee too but yet worlds apart from block comm. in terms of what i've learnt, what i've earned. i was so scared at first, because it felt like we were stepping into a world of mystery, full of doubts and questions and uncertainty. there was so much about this job/role that we didnt know. putting up a dance concert in all its entirety, right from the beginning when we had nothing. till we had Fervore. and before that in the past few years, all we ever knew were our bump-in timings and prepping ourselves with makeup and music in our ears, our way around the backstage, and our way around the stage. but behind-the-scenes there was really so much more than that. i remember the rush of emotions when the curtains closed that Tuesday night. the relief and the joy at all that we had achieved, at the success Fervore had achieved. Fervore was our baby (:

and then after that, came "Fly With You". i think without being in dance comm, i wouldn't have been pushed to step up as choreo for seniors' performance. basically in this one year, dance-wise, i've really been stretched to my limits, stepped out of all my comfort zones and pushed beyond my usual boundaries. and all in retrospect, i can only be thankful to the people that have prodded me in the right direction. because my courage stems from their belief, and none of my own.

and now, a change in status quo is always a little difficult to get used to, it felt a little strange running about outside while they were having dance comm meeting inside, their very first. and people still asking me for dance studio usage, but then now i'm no longer in charge! but i'll get used to it. and i know in time to come i'll relish this new-found freedom, just for a little while before i plunge into touch co-captaincy.

but i'm so glad i ran for dance comm in the end. Inception is indeed a powerful thing. the seniors planted that idea in my head, and from there it grew into reality. but i'm glad i dared to try, because now i won't know what that regret would feel like. and having been there and done that, i wouldn't have wanted to miss it for the world.

xinyi cartwheeled in the rain at 03:21

Monday, September 13, 2010

as much as i hate to admit it,
i miss cheering, and i miss flying.

when im away from the mats, its easier to not think about it. i just immerse myself in my "right then right there" wherever i am and enjoy the moment, and it seems like its alright and nothing's missing. but when im on the mats, i feel the desire.


i miss a lot of things.

i miss working, i miss scooping. but more than just scooping, i miss all the quirky moments behind the dipcase, i miss the camaraderie.


and most of all, i miss having time for myself.

xinyi cartwheeled in the rain at 03:05