Spiral staircase — Moda-Creative thinking
Archive for May, 2019
Stream of consciousness…
I think we are all questions without answers for example can everything be attributed to our chemical makeups hormones brains or are we something entirely different from what we think we are I mean it’s possible that we have no idea what we are or maybe we are simply some kind of insane intelligence that was floating around and decided to inhabit a certain animal on a tiny blue planet on the arm of a galaxy whipping around in space we can’t know that that is not true because we don’t have a clue as to what is true and what isn’t just because we SAY something is true doesn’t mean that it is because everyone has a different idea about what truth is and why are some people hungry for life while others sit in the midst of abundance and starve that’s another question that can’t be answered except through chemical imbalance etc. but I think there’s more to it than that I think that we ARE inside of ourselves each something very different and our innate personality for lack of a better word is what it is and that’s why you get what you get and you can’t change the core of a person even if you try and even if the person ACTS differently the real he or she still exists inside because that is something that simply is and no matter how a person tries to cover it up or ignore it it’s still there forever and ever because it’s the beginning of their being and that is something that simply is and what simply is cannot be tampered with no matter what anyone does even if they lie and hungry people can’t be stopped because if they are they die quickly from lack of stimulation lack of ideas and the freedom to write or paint or make music or do what whatever they have to do to get the stuff out of themselves before the implode and the ideas float away on the air and are distributed throughout all the universes that exist and are picked up by other beings when they dream and are brought forth in a great creative burst but the seed was begun by another in a different place or dimension and just planted at night unbeknown to the dreamer and that’s how things get from one place to another even through black holes who can’t stop thought even though they can stop light but each of us IS something we don’t understand or know and that something is what makes us search because it wants to be known and understood because it can’t breath properly with all the layers of illusion that are heaped upon it and all it truly wants is to be set free so that it can create beautiful things but we keep it buried and refuse to look at it or let it out because then we’ll have to deal with that part of ourselves and since we don’t know what it is we don’t want to take the chance on what we could be and what about our bodies did we take them form others and just move in did overpower the beings who were in them first and when we took them if we did did we absorb the native species or kill it maybe we will never know and maybe that’s not the case because we really can’t get one single answer to anything so we make things up and since the answers we make up don’t answer anything at all because they are based on fantasy we slowly go mad because that thing inside us knows that nothing here is true or real and while we often run as fast as we can while we search for our own personal truth there is none to be found because truth is elusive and does not exist on a planet where nothing is real so in order to stay alive we lie to ourselves and say that whatever happens might not be okay but it’s the way things are when everything is really just the way we make them and there is no reason for war or hate or misery or suffering unless we want it to exist and we can’t FIND ANY ANSWERS BECAUSE WE CAN’T GET PAST THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES so we are blinded by out own thoughts and false beliefs like those who believe in pretend gods who are invisible and rule over people who can’t think for themselves and we pretend that it’s okay to go to foreign countries and kill innocent women and children and old people and each other for money and goods and we try to make the bad things into good things and the we wonder why people are miserable and unhappy and why they hit others and bully others and don’t know where to put their rage and their loss of their true selves and we just pretend harder and tell everyone it’s okay that things are falling apart and that we’re killing all living beings because that’s easier than doing something about stopping it from happening and when there are no more places to hide and our children are at a dead end people will say they did the best they could for frightened deluded fantasizing people who refused to stand up and say no fucking more and the kids will die knowing they came from cowards who had been brainwashed into apathy and couldn’t even act to save them and they won’t understand not really because they live with the illusion that things could have been different than they were not knowing that no one even knows who or what they are or why they’re here or what this place is and all they’ve done is run the maze for the gain of others and they have dedicated their life not to pleasure and joy but locked in buildings they work for war and taxes and a slow loss of blood until they can crawl out of the maze and die and their job for the state that has used them up can finally be handed over to the next generation as they move into their position and rinse and repeat over and over until no one is left and the planet is finally quiet and the bodies are gone and still no one will ever knows what it was all about
How they met…
“Shhhhh,” she hissed. “This is a library.”
He made weird hand motions and started doing charades.
She snickered and hit him with the book in her hand.
He flipped open his note pad and wrote…IF I DON’T FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE I WILL DIE. STOP. SERIOUSLY, MY HEART WILL BLEED OUT IN MY CHEST AND THE LAST THINK I WILL REMEMBER IS YOUR GORGEOUS FACE AND THE FACT THAT YOU’RE READING A BOOK CALLED, KILL PATRIARCHY. STOP. He tore off the page and handed it to her. She read it and wrote back.
I want to watch, so how long do you think it will take for your heart to stop because I have things to do and don’t want to stand around waiting for you to go to the other side. She handed the note back to him and tapped her foot, pulled out another book and put it on top of the first one.
MAYBE THREE OR FOUR MINUTES. I’LL TRY AND BLEED AS FAST AS I CAN BECAUSE I LOVE YOU THAT MUCH.
She laughed at that, then covered her mouth and whispered, “Library.”
He grinned and said, “Let’s blow this joint baby,” in the worst Bogart accent she ever heard.
She sighed and said, “I told you, all you have to do is whistle. You know how to whistle, don’t you? You just put your lips together and…”
“…blow.”
“Follow me,” she said, dragging him by his sleeve.
She took him to a tiny space where there were four vending machines and two small round tables. The place was deserted.
“What IS YOUR PROBLEM?” she asked.
“I saw you and fell in love. You know what love is, right? I can’t help it, it’s kind of like in the Twilight movie where the wolf imprints on the baby…”
“OMG, please stop now.”
He sat there smiling at her. “Can I buy you a bag of chips?”
“What kind?”
“Your choice.”
“Baked.”
He bought two bags and two bottles of water.
“You do a terrible Bogart,” she said, “but it was cute anyway. Thank you for the food.”
“You’re welcome. Now, who are you and if you’re not busy next week, we can get married and go to Italy on our honeymoon.”
“What time?”
“Early, it’a a long flight.”
“What day?”
“How about Monday.”
“Who are you?”
“Is that a loaded question, or do you just want to know who I am?”
“The second one.”
“Name’s Jake and I like to travel. Grew up around here but it didn’t stick. I never thought I would fall in love, or want to be with anyone long term, but today has convinced me otherwise.”
“Well, Jake. I like to travel as well.”
“I knew you were perfect.”
“My name is Sunny and I never even thought of falling in love. It seems like a trap to me.”
“It won’t be with me, I promise.”
“I’ve known you for…she looked at her phone…seventeen minutes.”
“In this lifetime, you mean,” he said seriously. “Tell me you don’t feel what I do and I’ll leave.”
She sighed.
“I thought so.”
“Why are you at the library?”
“Not sure. Woke up this morning and a little voice said, GO TO THE LIBRARY. I always listen to that voice, so here I am.”
“Do you even like libraries?”
“Hate them, actually. I like bookstores. They have bookstores in Italy and Paris.”
“Paris is my favorite place.”
“Paris is everyone’s favorite place.”
“Hard to argue with that,” she said.
“It’s been twenty-five minutes now. Did you make up your mind? Can you give me an answer?”
“You mean, do I want to get married Monday?”
“Yes.”
“Okay.”
He grabbed her hand and kissed her palm. “You’ll never be sorry.”
“If I am, you’ll know it.”
He laughed, “Then I’ll have deserved it.”
“Don’t you think we should find out more about each other first?”
“No, lets unwrap each other on the way.”
She leaned against him. “That, is the most delicious thing I’ve ever heard.”
Choices…a poem
we get to spend our lives
in different ways
depending on where we
came from
depending on what we’ve
been taught
depending on
who we are
there is no right or wrong
things just are
we get to CHOOSE
from what we see around us
not many surfers in Chicago
no ocean
no surf
no sun
no anything
surf boards don’t sell here
environment is everything
when it comes to choices
that’s why we’re all different
we just have to remember
that we would be
like the people we see
if we came from where they did
and vice versa
and we need to remember
that our earliest environments
stay with us
even if we leave them
later in life
forever
Life..a poem
no one knows
what’s going to happen
next
we go through
our daily routines
but we are usually
asleep as we walk
the mazes that are carved
into our brain cells
from never ending
repetition
but the fact is
life is always
a surprise
we just never know
if the surprise
will be
good
or
bad
A short…How they met…
“Do you like parades?” he asked the woman standing in front of him in the checkout line.
The checker looked at him, then at her. She shrugged and shook her head. “Worst pickup line I ever heard,” she muttered.
“It’s wasn’t a pickup line,” he said. “There’s a parade outside and I just wondered if she liked parades, that’s all.”
The checker chuckled. “Right.”
“What’s the parade for?” asked the woman, emptying the rest of her cart onto the moving belt.
“No idea,” he said.
“It’s an END OF THE WORLD parade,” said the checker. “Teenagers are putting it on.”
“Do they think the world is ending?” asked the woman.
“They think it already has,” said the checker. “Don’t you?”
“No,” said the man and woman, at the same time.
“Then you’re not really paying attention, are you.”
“Excuse me?” said the woman. “What’s that supposed to mean.”
“Hey,” yelled a guy four people down the line. “Can you stop talking and get on with it? I’d like to get home sometime this week.”
The woman paid and the man asked her to wait for him. She glared at him and left immediately. The man grabbed his bags and went after her.
“I think they deserve each other,” said the next man in line.
The checker smiled, and started to ring up his dark chocolate fudge Ben and Jerry’s, cat food, cookies, crusty bread, French jam, and oranges. She stopped moving, bit her bottom lip, and looked at him. He was staring at her.
“Can I take you to lunch?” he asked.
“Now?”
“Whenever you can go.”
She put the CLOSED sign on the belt, to the groaning and yelling of everyone in line.
“Are you married? Or, do you have someone in your life?” she asked.
“I hope I do now,” he said. “Won’t you lose your job, if you just walk away?”
“I think I just quit. It was only part-time, until my book sells. Besides, life’s all about walking off the edge and knowing there’s a net that will catch you, isn’t it?”
“It is, and I’ve heard the strawberry on the way down is delicious.”
Rethinking Life 
Written
on May 30, 2019