Naked Lunch (1991)

There’s no getting around it: “Naked Lunch” is hell of a ride. This infamous adaptation of the source novel by William S. Burroughs is more about the writing of the novel than the novel’s own plot, and in addition, it’s directed by David Cronenberg, so you just know there’s a bunch of weird, creepy sex imagery designed to get under your skin, so it’s certainly not for a modest audience. That being said, there’s no denying that this is a vivid cinematic experience, even by Cronenberg’s standards: The psychosexual nature of the source material is perfect for Cronenberg’s recurring fascination with grotesque sexual imagery, all of which is effectively blended with the movie’s semi-surreal, dream-like narrative. It’s almost like watching “Brazil” and “Communion” at the same time on the same screen, with a dash of Stuart Gordon’s “Re-Animator” making occasional cameo appearances; that’s the best way I can describe what it feels like to watch this movie. Peter Weller’s inscrutability and emotive blankness makes him the perfect unreliable narrator for this wicked, demented tale, but the movie belongs to Ian Holm, who owns every inch of the screen whenever he appears. Cronenberg occasionally flirts with fever-dream-style hallucinatory overload but it’s impressive how he manages to tell a genuinely sad tale of drug addiction, sexual repression and murder all while making the experience feel like you’re watching someone else’s nightmare unfold in real time.

Rating: ★★★★ (out of 5)

Screamers (1995)

I don’t know why it took me so long to get around to watching “Screamers,” but I kinda wish I hadn’t actually watched it because it’s pretty darn boring. As a French Canadian growing up in the ’90s, Roy Dupuis was a big home-turf superstar (thanks to shows like “Lance et Compte” and “Les Filles de Caleb”), so his English-speaking debut here was a big deal for us, but even so, it wasn’t enough to draw me in. There are some good ideas here and there throughout the movie, most of them lifted from “Tremors” and “Mad Max” but effective enough on their own, but for some reason the movie just never comes alive. It feels like a series of repetitive conversations that don’t add up to much, while there’s some action that livens things up here and there, but overall it’s a slog to get through. The special effects are horribly dated (and it’s hard to believe that they would have been considered impressive even in 1995), and leads Peter Weller and Jennifer Rubin look like they’re rather be anywhere other than in the same shot together, so there’s just nothing to go on. I watched it just a few days ago and I’ve already largely forgotten the climax… and I’m not sure I was even paying attention anymore by the time I got there, because finishing the movie had become a “run out the clock” situation.

Rating: ★★ (out of 5)

Leviathan (1989)

“Leviathan” is one of those late 80s/early 90s studio horror movies that’s *almost* great, but falls just short. Its chief asset is its incredibly potent plotline, which features underwater miners that encounter a sunken ship that shouldn’t exist, and the ensuing terror and chaos that their investigation into the shipwreck sparks. With a number of great-looking underwater sequences that are as creative as they are charming, not to mention its increasingly claustrophobic indoor sets that force a striking contrast between the shots, it’s impressive how director George P. Cosmatos establishes an oppressive, anything-can-happen atmosphere fairly early on. Additionally, the creature effects are carefully revealed on the way to an explosive climax, and while it’s easy to see the influence of “Alien” all over the movie, it feels more deferential than derivative. However, the movie’s overall impact is diluted by the paper-thin screenplay and its resulting lackluster performances: Despite a solid cast of upper-echelon genre veterans like Peter Weller, Ernie Hudson and Kathleen Quinlan, no one seems to know how to play their respective characters so they’re all just window dressing in between the special effects showcases instead of the other way around. That being said, the movie’s still a lot of fun to watch and memorable in its own way.

Rating: ★★★ (out of 5)

Faerie Tale Theatre: “The Dancing Princesses” (1987)

It’s a shame that this beloved family show ended on this rather unfortunate episode. Although the Brothers Grimm fairy tale is lovely to read, it doesn’t translate very well to the screen, despite direction by the usually terrific Peter Medak (who directed “The Changeling” and “Romeo is Bleeding,” among others). Lesley Ann Warren makes for an intriguing leading lady here but unfortunately she’s matched with Peter Weller, who seems like he’d rather be anywhere else. It makes for a restrained, rather slow paced experience, and although the costumes and set design are both excellent, it’s not enough to rescue the episode from doldrums.

Rating: ★★ (out of 5)