Ironic Quotes

“Does anyone win the race of life, or do we all get participation trophies?”
― Alexis Patton, Us Dark Few

“Dressing up is just like watching cartoons, something you enjoyed as a kid, before it passes through the no man’s land of teen angst, the ironic age of early twenties. And then somehow, miraculously, it crosses back into the realm of the genuine, the nostalgic. A place reserved for wonder.”
― V.E. Schwab

“It hurt me with its inevitability. They all find out sooner or later how unchic it is to pop your buttons at the Sadie Hawkins dance, or to crawl into the trunk so you can get into the drive-in for free. They stop eating pizza and plugging dimes into the juke down at Fat Sammy’s. They stop kissing boys in the blueberry patch. And they always seem to end up looking like Barbie doll cutouts in Jack and Jill magazine. Fold in at Slot A, Slot B, and Slot C. Watch Her Grow Old Before Your Very Eyes.”
― Richard Bachman, Rage

“We're going to get ice cream,' Finny says.
'I'm being kidnapped,' I say.”
― Laura Nowlin, If He Had Been with Me

“...which is still not a plot twist I saw coming.”
― Kiran Millwood Hargrave, Julia and the Shark

“It's ironic that we associate taste with connoisseurship, subtlety, and fine discrimination when it is among the coarsest of senses.”
― Ed Yong, An Immense World: How Animal Senses Reveal the Hidden Realms Around Us

“Take him out drinking with you somewhere in Qingyuan tonight. Then on the way home,” she said, “kill him.” —Zhu”
― Shelley Parker-Chan, He Who Drowned the World

“Birds
 of
a
feather
burn
together,
 though
as
a
rule
ravens
are
singular”
― Margaret Atwood, Morning in the Burned House: Poems

“The maze reappeared, in ghostly blue this time, the pellets punctuated by countless miniature foods--- not only fruits but pixelated pizza slices, tiny sushi rolls, petite hamburgers. Ms. Pac-Man faded onto the screen, not in the bottom half, where she usually started, but in the central box, where the ghosts usually did. Instead of her trademark yellow, she appeared blinking, in blue.
"She's--- she's one of the ghosts?"
Maura took up the controls again. Kostya watched her move through the maze, eating everything in sight.
"It's a secret level," Maura told him. "Only available in the 1983 rerelease of the Japanese cabinet. It's called the Hungry Ghost Maze."
"So it's a bonus round? The point's just to... get more points?"
"The points don't matter in the ghost realm. To clear this level, you have to find the Happy Meal. Hidden in one of these fruits is a portal that gets you back to the real world.”
― Daria Lavelle, Aftertaste

“I have no human failings, none whatsoever. All my failings are animal.”
― Jamie O'Neill, At Swim, Two Boys

“I looked down at him, saying nothing. I felt like I’d become uselessly taller.”
― Won-pyung Sohn, Almond

“Then they both stand there on the sidewalk and stare at each other, the dog in terror, the man in hatred. It's the same thing every day.”
― Matthew Ward, The Stranger

“Ironic, isn’t it? You’d think someone as powerful as Jack would have admirers far and wide among witch-kind. Unfortunately, he’s experienced quite the opposite. For Jack, the world couldn’t be any more of a lonely place.”
― Lily velez, The Connelly Boys

“Now King had all the accoutrements of success: a Porsche, a mortgage, a divorce, a kid he saw on weekends.”
― Michael Crichton, The Lost World

“I had talked myself into believing that I hadn’t actually lost it as much as I thought I had when Mensah had offered to let me hang out in the hub with the humans like I was an actual person or something.”
― Martha Wells, All Systems Red

“In the criminal justice system you see the worst people on their best behavior, unlike the civil system, where the best people behave at their worst.”
― Edna Buchanan, Suitable for Framing

“Are you so goddamn sure of yourself that you're stupid? How can anyone so smart be so stupid?”
― Patricia Cornwell, Blow Fly

“Bagaimana bisa penulis-penulis ini menjadikan sastra sebagai takdir, sebagai militansi, di tengah mayoritas orang yang tidak bisa membaca atau tidak mampu membeli buku, atau minoritas yang bisa, tetapi tidak suka membaca?”
― Mario Vargas Llosa, Matinya Seorang Penulis Besar

“The daemonhost surged through the air at me, teeth bared, arms spread, incandescent with light, baying my name. It was like facing the attack run of a supersonic warcraft firing all guns. I know so. It is my misfortune to have experienced that too.”
― Dan Abnett, Malleus

“The ironic thing about Stormy Daniels and President Trump is had he bragged about his ‘friendship’ with the porn star, he may have been more popular!”
― Steven Magee

“Death invokes fear in heroes,

while small talk invokes fear in me”
― Lucy Carter, For the Intellect

“The count somehow managed to smile at her and frown menacingly at miles at the same time. The sergeants frown was democratically universal.”
― Lois McMaster Bujold, The Warrior's Apprentice

“Oto ironia, przed którą stają wszystkie rozwijające się firmy: wzrost rodzi złożoność, a złożoność zabija wzrost”
― John Vincent, Winning Not Fighting: Why you need to rethink success and how you achieve it with the Ancient Art of Wing Tsun

“Maybe heaven is a place for execution and hell is just a test for good
Maybe she had a reason for what she did to us that I can't see.”
― Devashish kaushik

“The sooner we finish this one, the sooner we can move on to another."
"We don't need to finish this one," Hyacinth said, although if they didn't, she was going to have to sneak it home and finish it herself.
"Don't be silly. We can't not finish it. I paid good money for that nonsense. And besides" -Lady D lookedas sheepish as she was able when she said this, which, admittedly, wasn't very sheepish- "I wish to know how it ends.”
― Julia Quinn, It's in His Kiss

“The captain’s course does not define the size of the iceberg.”
― Roberto Verde Ixion

“It was, however, eclipsed almost immediately by a glow of smugness at the thought that, deficient though he let himself might be in the area of materializing out of fireplaces, there had never been a murder in any of the government departments under his charge... Not yet, anyway...”
― J.K. Rowling

“A boggart's arrogance knows no bounds; they fancy themselves above kings and queens."
This was so rich that I actually snorted. Lord Taran gave me a narrow-eyed look.”
― Heather Fawcett, Emily Wilde's Compendium of Lost Tales

“Our compassion that night had been the final nail in our coffins. It was so ironically sad.”
― Jennifer L. Armentrout, Origin

“I've never won an award. I have nothing to offer the jury.”
― Ljupka Cvetanova, Yet Another New Land