When I was travelling overseas, a fellow traveler, a male, said to me that he could pick an Aussie woman out of a crowd just because of the shape of her arse. Huh. Granted, he was drunk at the time he made this grand pronouncement and possibly I was a tad legless myself but it’s a comment that always stuck in my mind and I’m sorry I forgot to ask him why he had that theory.

But I digress, last Sunday I wrote a blog with the title ‘pointy penises in pink panties.’ It was an experiment which, judging by the emails I received, confused quite a few people. That’s always fun. The reason I used that title was all to do with body parts - specifically bottoms, arses, bums, derrieres. Confused? No doubt.

The Monday before that I wrote a blog on assumptions. I called it ‘Ass - u – me’ - you know, the old saying of “when you assume you make an ass out of you and me.” Anyway, I was quite agog at the hits this assumption blog received. It was just my usual rambling post so I couldn’t work out why I had all these extra readers - it was great - thank you for staying on and reading - then it occurred to me. It was all to do with the 'ass' in the title. As for the ‘U’ and ‘me’? One can only surmise that would refer to what one could do with an ass.

Anyway I wrote the Penis/panties blog title to test my theory on body parts in the title affecting readership. I did get a similar response but slightly less new hits. I believe this indicates the arses are more popular than penises. No, it’s not conclusive and yes, the experiment was half-arsed…pardon the pun.

And something fascinatingly bizarre…

THE attempted armed robbery of a Russian hairdresser became a three-day sex ordeal for the would-be thief, leaving him with torn genitals and a Viagra hangover.

IT website The Register reports the man, known as Viktor, tried to rob the hairdresser in the town of Meshchovsk.

The owner, 28-year-old Olga, agreed to hand over the takings but as she was giving him the money, used her karate skills to knock him to the ground and tie him up with a hairdryer cord.

She then locked him in the storeroom and told colleagues she’d call the police.

However, she instead stripped him and cuffed him to a heater with a pair of fluffy pink handcuffs. She then fed him Viagra and raped him several times over the next four days.

When finally released, Viktor went first to hospital for treatment for his torn frenulum, and then reported Olga to the police. When she was arrested, Olga reported him for robbery.

“What a bastard,” she complained. “Yes, we had sex a couple of times. But I’ve bought him new jeans, gave him food and even gave him 1000 roubles when he left.”

Viktor admitted she had fed him well.

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,25819498-401,00.html

I especially like the last line…

www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Be daring...read an Amarinda book

…it seems every email I get or blog I read, someone has a book trailer they want you to look at. It’s almost like a cult. I don’t really get the point of book trailers. If you had a massive reading audience then maybe but even then I tend to think people would buy your books because they like your books. And have you noticed all the trailers look the same? Generally it’s just close up of the book cover shown over and over and over again – the hero’s chest in close up, his left nipple – then pan out to see his chest – then focus on his right nipple – then pan around the cover to his thigh, his big toe, his left ear – and oh yeah then let’s take a close up of the woman he’ll have sex with - while words are displayed on the screen telling you what is the story in supposedly seductive language. Why not just say “look at the man’s pecs, isn’t he pretty, buy the book, it’s got sex in it.” It’s about as subtle. Yeah – you know my email address…

…what is it with people sending you photos of body parts on your mobile (cell) phone? Huh? I don’t understand it. I got one today at work – not the most conducive place. Mind you it was meant to be disruptive. It was something very specific that was designed to make me think. Yes, I knew who it belonged to and it was kind of hard not to look at it. Why would you photograph yourself like this? Apparently it’s fun and titillation….oh, and the camera ‘slipped’. I was asked to reciprocate with a “photo of left breast.” I sent the picture above. Well, he never mentioned my actual breast….How many women would do that?

…why do people insist you follow some dumb arsed rule they have never told anyone else about in 3 years – ok, maybe it is written somewhere - then when you give in to their whining because it’s like an ice pick through your ear – they make no effort to follow the rule themselves. I had that happen today. The overnight mail “must” be ready at 3:30pm to be picked up at 3:30pm by the courier, in a certain place or the world will end. We left at 4pm and the mail was still sitting in the certain place so if the world ends I know who we can blame. This is why I don’t follow rules. They’re stupid.

www.amarindajones.com
www.amarindajones.blogspot.com
Go Ahead : Live with abandon. Be outrageous at any age. What are you saving your best self for?