Pacey's Tots

The Curse of the Black Pearl: Good plot and that kept us entertained.
Dead Man's Chest: No plot, but it was damn funny and that kept us entertained.
At World's End: No plot, not as much comic relieve. But I kinda got entertained, but only in the last hour.

After 2 weeks of not blogging, there's so many things u wana tok about, but simply u'll forget to.

gubra, the sequel to sepet came into the store the other day, i immediately grabbed one n reserved it. now, its sitting on my cupboard cos i din have the time to watch it. Forced dear to watch sepet the other day, but we din mange to finish cos his laptop threw tantrums.

FIR released a new album after so long! new album not so rock, more chill out, jazzy kind.

i booked my driving test date on 20th Oct. Hopefully i'll pass. if not, i'll most prob have to take my final theory exam again cos it would expire in Nov. Rite now, i'm trying to cramp as many lessons as possible. One infuriating thing is that although i passed my basic theory b4 i registered with the driving school, i still have to go for 2 classes of basic theory! damn, i only found out recently. so, although i had already passed all the theory test needed for driving, i still have to go for lessons... bo liao, waste my time only... haiz, but not much of a choice. if i don't go for the time wasting n money wasting classes, i can't take my driving test!

went ktv with dear the other day. at last, after sooooo long. i would usually sing the songs by my fave artists last. so i sang janice wei lan, a*mei, etc... everyone except FIR!!! it was only after we left the place for dinner thn dear asked me, "how come today never sing FIR ah?" then i realised that i had forgotten to choose their songs! damn!

hmm, wht else... another day mayb... need to study...

Friday, dear was on leave so we went out walk walk... first we collected the tickets for just like heaven starring reese witherspoon at cineleisure till "he" stopped me in my tracks. he was as tall as an avg 7 yr old kid. he wore green frame specs and had a very cute little round face. he wore a pair of shorts n t-shirt n just stood there looking at me. n this he told me weeks ago that he has a mission and that's to save the world. his name is chicken little! upon seeing the cute little thing standing there looking at me saying "take me home" i really felt like grabbing him n run for my life, catch a cab n go home, hoping no police will come after me. of cos, feeling like doing it and doing it was a different thing altogether since its a crime to steal. i eagerly shuffled my feet towards the cute little one n wanted to pat him on his head till i saw "do not touch. this display is protected by cctv..." so instead of me playing the baddie, i proposed to dear to grab chicken little for me. he said, u want me or chicken little. lol... so as he pulled me away to get the tickets, my eyes n head followed my chicken little. awwww, so cute... luma luma lei... mai hi, mai hu, mai ho, mai ha ha... the picture of him dancing to this tune telling pple to switch off their mobile phones played again in my mind.
after collecting the tickets, we thn had lunch at pastamania which had loads of garlic. it was so much that till i burped after dinner, we could still smell the garlic. after lunch, its showtime... Touching romantic story, could connect with her "i wana stay alive" character. the way thy fell in love, so subtly n smoothly put across. after the show we walked ard cineleisure a bit till i got caught up with my zhuan zhuan...
its actually toy or small little handphone accessories that comes in small capsules. they are placed in a box. u insert 1 to 3 1-dollar coins in n turn a knob for the capsule to drop out. what comes in the capsule depends on your luck, like my ruffy the other time. this time round, i saw n aimed one mini piglet torch, one piglet handphone accessory and one my melody handphone accessory. dear so good, sponsored for all the capsules. my melody was 1 dollar a piece, got it at the 3rd try. piglet handphone accessory was 2 dollars a piece, got it on the 4th try. the mini torch was the irritating one, at 2 dollars a piece, it came only on the 5th try. total damage was worth 16 dollars of unwanteds.
after all the zhuan zhuan we walked down to paragon's M1 to check out the price for a data cable for sony erricsson hps. dun have... thn we went to wisma's sony gallery, aso dun have... then we went to food republic for dinner. hehe... again... haha... i tried the hand made noodles n he took the fried hokkien prawn mee. after dinner we walked a little while more at taka's mango and cold storage n tt's whn i started feeling lousy. there was a light pain on my right chest. after cold storage, we went home.
at home, pain was still there n it was worse whn i coughed, breath deeply, sneeze or try to talk a little loudly. then my parents came back. n my kiasu mum called dr hwang's clinic straight away. dr hwang advised to go straight to mt. e's a&e rite away. there, a chest x-ray was done, but the resident doc found nothing much. given painkillers and instructions to see dr hwang the next day. dear stayed over just in case i hurt in the nite n cant scream for help.

saturday, went to dr hwang's clinic. while waiting for her to finish her rounds at the ward, i vomitted. n whn i vomit, i could still the pain. i vomitted some of my dinner, apperently by my own experience in this kinda vomitting, its a mixture of indigestion and too hungry.
dr hwang said it was Pleurisy, a swelling and irritation of the membrane that surrounds the lungs. i was given a booster jab n oral antibiotics.
then my parents n i went for brunch while dear went to mit the guys. on the way up to food republic (again! hahaha...), mum n i got our attention on some clothes for sale on wagon display. i bought a 3-quarts for 30+.
my dad tried the zha jiang mian, mum took roti prata, while me, pork sukiyaki. for 16 bucks, the sukiyaki was quite a worth it portion. loads of cabbage n meat, with 2 huge pieces of tofu (abt a quarter of a norm size slab), a small bunch of enokidake (golden mushrooms), 5 slices of carrots and one miserable black mushroom. it was worth it cos it was huge, but surely it did not hurt more to add a few more black mushrooms. taste wise was quite ok...
went home n reminded my dad to make reservations for dinner tonite to celebrate mum's bday in advance. the place we wanted to go to was grand copthorne waterfront but it was full. so we changed venue to melt the world cafe at oriental hotel. but they could only make space for us at 8.30pm. then i took a nap. didnt sleep well the nite b4 cos of the pain. woke up n made our way down to marina square cos my sis wanted to look for something. anyway we are early n marina square was just beside oriental. in the car, i threw up again. threw up a little of my lunch. its another bout of indigestion n being too hungry. upon reaching marina square, immediately looked for toilet to rinse my mouth.
my sis could not find what she wanted so we made our way to oriental. we were slightly early at the restaurant for our dinner but they let us in anyway. but, it was kinda, not full house, with a few empty tables here n there, n i started wondering, y 8.30? ate till they closed shop, haha... but not shiok enough, cos i didnt have the full-till-i-wana-puke-n-stay-off-food-for-a-week feeling. usually on buffets, i would binge till i feel that, but not enough time! haha... went home n watch soccer. dear did not stay overnight cos he was out the whole day n his parents just came back from thailand.

Sunday, was doing cross stitch whole afternoon till dear fetch me out to jelita. did some grocery shopping n bought pizza for dinner. upon reaching home, opened a can of campbell cream of mushroom n ate pizza n watched tv at the same time. after dinner, dear watched soccer while i made cheesecake. mango chilled cheesecake... haven tried yet.. haha...
whn my sis came back (all went out), dear went to central to catch the man u game cos it would be too late n he has to take a cab... save money while we can... haha...

after the eventful weekend, comes today. should be chemo day, but doc say since i still feel the pain, she'll delay the chemo till wed. so mum n i went to walk walk n have lunch. walked over to far east where she bought toto. then went over to isetan scotts supermarket to get some stuff. n on the way there, on the mango window display a top caught my eye, but mango only opens at 11am n it was still early.
so, after grocery shopping n brunch at mos burger, it was shopping time at mango. so so happy! its been sooooooo long since i've slowly walked thru the racks at mango. found a bag and the top. total damage to pocket today, 152 after discount with mango card. damn, i'm such a sucker for mango stuff. Claudia Schiffer is the poster girl for mango now, damn, i envy her...

On friday, dear took leave to spend the entire day with me. y so special? cos its our anniversary! so fast, one year already... time really flies...

so, he came over while i was bathing and left the bouquet he bought for me on my table. so i only saw it when i went back to my room. the bouquet had a dozen roses. the roses were not pink, nor were they red. the colour was kinda a mixture of both.

we left the house abt 1pm and made our way down to ikea for lunch. y ikea? i'm an ikea friends member n everyday, something from the menu will be specially discounted for members (limited to 2 dishes per member), besides that, there are 2 free drinks. friday was swedish meatballs day! i love the swedish meatballs at ikea.

after lunch, we went down to tiong bahru plaza. i think i'll be making trips there often from now on. reason is that they have a DMC store there. First one in singapore i've seen. DMC is a company specializing in cross-stitch and embroidery stuff, and having a store like this, i can easily get my materials. after getting some stuff from their gold concept (DMC thread "filing" system), we made our way down to plaza sing.

we picked up our tickets for Goal! and had our toilet break before going into the cinema. those who had not watched Goal! MUST watch! For someone like me who's fighting for survival and wanting a second chance at life to fufill my dreams, i can relate to the main character, Santiago Munez.

Throughout the movie, i cried a few times. i cried when munez's dad took his money to buy a van. his dad wanted to path a future and career for him by owning a business, but to munez, tt's not suited for him. he wans to play soccer, professionally. to him, tt's a career most suited for him. munez needed that money to go to newcastle for a trial. for that moment, all his hopes and dreams were dashed. Just like me, when i was first diagnosed.

then when he finally made it to newcastle, fellow reserve squad members made things difficult for him. they rough tackled him, did not pass the ball to him so he did not have a chance to show off his skills and worse of all, crushed his inhaler as he had asthma. just when he thought he had at last reached england, it would be easier from then on, but no, he still had to cross hurdles. just like me, just when i tot i had finished radiotherapy, crossed the hurdle and won the battle, and was well already, my backaches were actually signs that the cancer cells had spread, to my bones n liver. now, i have to cross another hurdle and receive chemotherapy.

At the end of the movie, i cried again. Its all smooth sailing for him. but when for me? to me, when its smooth sailing for him, it would be the day i have won this battle. dear cried at the end of the movie too.

After the movie, we went down to suntec for jap buffet dinner at kuishin-bo. not worth 40 bucks. it had ample variety that looks 40 bucks, but the dishes were salty and tasted so so only. they had a lot of meat and seafood, great for meat-lovers, and had only a salad, teppanyaki veg n cucumber sushi as proper veg only dishes. even the nabes (claypots) and soups had little veg in it although i n dear chose those. they should have a dish of stir fried shitake mushrooms or something. even the veg tempura was mostly spring onions, sweet potatos and mushrooms. but the food's really quite fresh. dessert spread variety was not bad, but few edible. really not worth 40 bucks, unless u whack the steamed crabs n prawns, soft shell crabs n ebi tempura.

after the dinner, we were walking over the tower three's (carrefour) taxi stand as there should be more taxis there, when we saw those capsule dispensers. They had one which dispenses anime, one piece, characters' handphone ornaments. i wanted ruffy n between me n dear we had only 4 1-dollar coins. one capsule cost 3 bucks n they only accepted 1-dollar coins. so we walked over to the arcarde to change for more 1-dollar coins. i changed 15 coins. while changing we saw a machine.

for 1 dollar, u can have 3 tries on this machine. u have 3 tries to accumulate a score of positive 5 to dispense a prize. prizes were like handphones, mp3 players n psp. seems easy? thy have loads of negative numbers n once u hit the "computer" n stop on those numbers, whatever score u have will be lowered, limited to zero. tried a few times for fun, but no luck. we went back to the capsule dispenser for my ruffy. 15 dollars and 5 capsules later, no ruffy but other characters, even 2 pirate bo.

then we went back to the arcarde for more coins. n of cos, we tried our luck again on the machine. no luck, but we discovered some tactics, which may or may not work. then we went back to the capsule dispenser. this time round, it was dear who put in the coins n turn the knob, guess what, it was ruffy!

we made our way to the taxi stand but it was a long q. so we called a cab n got home.

ystday, chelsea trashed bolton 5-1 n bolton was 1-0 up early in the game. when will teams learn how to hold on to their lead n win chelsea. chelsea must drop points in order for any other clubs to catch up. if not, the epl this year will be a one horse race.

just like today's f1 race, the chinese grand prix, final one of the season. it was boring... renault was 2 points ahead of mclaren for the constructors champion n alonso n fisichella were in pole n grid 2 position for the race. raikkonen was in grid 3. when the race started, fisichella was in charge of "blocking" the mclarens while alonso sped away, faster n faster lap timings with each lap to distance himself away from the mclarens so they have no chance to catch up. just when i tot raikkonen has chance to overtake alonso, the safety car's out... today, the safety car's out twice! totally spoiling the race, i think. lap by lap with the SC on, alonso cruises lap by lap in 1st position. boring...... of cos alonso won the race with raikkonen in 2nd.

Initial D was damn good. I really dun mind watching it again. Seriously, the dubbing was quite a pain to listen to, esp the lady who dubbed for Anne Suzuki, jus seemed too fake. n since jay's more fluent in chinese, he pratically just adr-ed his own part. d rest were jus ok... mayb should try to watch it in cantonese to see which dubbing is worse.

acting wise, everyone was good.
jay was jus being himself, not much acting to mention.
wang qiu sheng was damn good, really damn good, he should get a nomination for this.
Kenny bee was great too n the role is so totally un-him.
shawn yue n edison both were just as sauve n cool too.
anne suzuki was just acting cute, which is kinda easy given her cute face.
another fella worth nomination is chapman to, with his duh expression put onto certain lines, it really gave off comical effect n he knows when to use it, when not to.
geng hong ge's (as how jay n xiao zhu call him) chracter was meant to irritate n arrogant. n he did irritate me with the arrogance. glad tt he has a chanve to act in a big movie at last.
chen xiao chun's fans will be damn disappointed. although his billing is kinda "nice", saying zhu yan, he's actual timing doesn't really qualify for it. seems more like guest star, not much room for him to show his acting skills.

soundtrack is damn wonderful! i'm gonna get it once it hit the stores.

in all, i think the only "cocked up" thing in the movie is the billing. like wht i mentioned, chen xiao chun wasnt really zhu yan, but rather ke chuan, so was gen hong ge. even edison n shawn had ling xian zhu yan, but compared to jay or even chapman to, thy had lesser timing on screen. movie billing is one thing, on the movie poster it says another thing. funny billings...

Honestly about the movie... i liked the fact that
- the cheesy wipes, opening n ending sequence has not changed, 30 years down the road... It would not b a series if not for the similarities in these...
- Yoda (TM) is very wise but he speaks broken english! it just goes to prove that you dun hv to be eloquent to be wise. but failed, he has... even though a green lightsabre (TM) he has...
- the effects looked good, if not slightly better then those 30 years ago. but note, its slightly better... so how they did it 30 years ago for something that happened 20 years later when the twins grew up, was amazing!
- to just get pregnant, cry n die you can receive quite a high billing in d credits...
- there is finally a pause to everything... of cos the figurines, dvds, vcds, etc will be kept in production. but there will not be pple walking around in the streets dressed up as the charaters, holding lit up plastic rods going to a movie...
- its only 6 movies, but money rolls in non stop because 20 years down the road, pple will still wana watch what happens in a galaxy far away bcos of a few reasons... thy heard it from their dads... thy have watched it somehow on tv repeatedly... when their dads is watching it for the tens-or-hundreds-th time, they r watching it too...
- the game is already out b4 the movie hits the screens... ironic...

(In extreme fine print)
Disclaimers: pls read entry b4 this...

Never was a great fan of Star Wars (TM)... Only watched a bit here n there whenever those episodes with Han Solo (TM) was shown on tv... And how do i know the story of the battle in the galaxies far away? by reading... yes... everytime there's a new Star Wars (TM) movie, there would b write ups abt the whole full development of the script...

now whn the "missing" epi is finally shown, stats are compiled... stats of which character appeared in which epi, wht kinda "planes" n driods (TM) appeared in which epi, n of cos, last but not least, the family tree...

n of cos, i did the most noble thing a gf can do... tt's to accompany my dearest Yoda (TM) to catch the movie on the opening day... He really liked it, n for me, it would always b a guys' thing... n of cos, turning to the Dark Side (TM) thinking it could save your wife's life? noble, yes, but dark is always dark. so, learn to be clever n know what's good n bad, you must...

Things to propose...
- cinemas with liftable arm rests sell 2 seats for the price of 1
- show epi 1 to 6 in a row with breaks in between long enough for a power nap
- with free flow of drinks and snacks avaliable at a bar set up at the back of the cinema
or...
- chalets or hotel 81 (TM) chains offer a 3 days 2 nights package
- show epi 1 to 6 in a row on their in house video channel, with breaks in between long enough to cover the whole package or show epi 1 to 6 in a row over n over again repeatedly to cover the whole package on their in house video channel so that customers can choose when to tune in, when to take a break, when to sleep
- with free flow of drinks and snacks avaliable for room service

(In extreme fine print...)
Disclaimers...
Pls note all (TM) above except hotel 81 (TM) is trademark of LucasFilm (not too sure of the company name).
Pls note hotel 81 (TM) is trademark of hotel 81 (not too sure of the company name too).
Pls note that the idea of watching epi 1 to 6 in a row is to be done at your own risk. Pacey Tots will not be liable for any damages just for suggesting a stupid idea for fans n fanatics. Should anything happen to you, pls erase any memory of reading this here. I repeat, its just a stupid idea for fans n fanatics.

It seems foreva that I added an entry... so adding for the sake of adding...

passed my final theory... few more lessons and i can book for my pratical test already...

Someone whom i can kinda link to passed away... He's not my age, he's 53, with a cute daughter less than 5 years of age. he died whn he crashed into a stationery van/ truck/ heavy vehicle while on his bike. at work, those who know him and know my parents came forward and asked, "heard about YOUR uncle chew mat kiat?". of cos i heard about him, although i dun think i know him or seen him at all.. my parents talk abt him sometimes at home. since i dunno him, why do i feel a connection to him? cos he was my parents' ROM witness, my dad's close colleague, close frd...

Saw Bridget Jones 2 last wkend... Actually quite a bit of movies, but not much impact to write abt them... Y BJ2? part of me is like her, wishing n hoping a prince charming will love me and sweep me of my feet, searching for love and someone i can depend on... no matter wht misunderstandings, wht quarrels, wht cold wars, wht break-ups, in the end, i'm still with my tt prinnce charming because of one simple word... love...

How should i start this entry... let's date back to 2 sundays ago, 25th Jul...

F.I.R was in town and had a gig at Hard Rock Cafe. It was the first time I'm seeing them n hearin them live. They are fantastic! fabulous! superb! They are like so perfect. One pretty n sweet, the other, cool, the other, drop dead good looking, my ideal guy type...
F=Faye: Pretty n sweet, with a great voice to boot. She has the ability to go solo anytime. She's like A*Mei, sounded betta live rather then cd (although both have diff singing styles) and has great stage presence. I've always tot there are 2 diff type of singers, the performer/ entertainer (read: "idol" type eg, Aaron Kwok in the past when he just started out) and the singer (read: only sing, do nothin else, eg Qi Yu, Cai Qin). Reason I like A*Mei is that she fall into both catergory, so does Faye. When she sang a verse of A*Mei's Lan Tian, she sang it sooo beautifully in her own way.
I=Ian: Lao Shi!!! The brains behind this band. Composer, producer, keyboardist. A*Mei's Lan Tian was done by him too. (tt's y Faye sang it at the gig) Damn cool! Was drooling at his coolness, given his age of 30+. haha... Gotta thank him for bringing them together, without him, there wouldn't be F.I.R.
R=Real aka Ah Qing. This is the drop dead good looker. Stupid photos I've seen of him in the press so far make him look fat n ugly. Mayb cos he has a kinda wide face cos of his jawline. when he smiles, he's cute. When he does not smile, he looks cool n suave. my ideal guy type lah, the kinda guy whose type of look can vary but still good looking lah... He's very very obliging. Call him, he turns n smiles, INTO your cam!!! Damn talented too. If he goes solo, he'll be hot property. he can sing! so wht if he's just a guitarist. He has the voice that really melts you... ahhhhh...
After the gig, it was the autograph session at West Mall. IDIOT warner staff, after I finish toking to lao shi n faye, can tok to ah qing already!!! but, this idiot, ask me how many cd sleeves i brought up thn hurry me off the stage!!! i haven even shook ah qing's hand nor tok to him!!! argh... tt's one disappointing part... another was, i have so many friends in NTU, but none could get tics for the gig at NTU... Q was too long and most had to rush for lessons, some din even bother to reply me!!! grr...

Last sunday, 1st, went for a malay wedding lunch buffet. it was Hamari's son's wedding. supposed to go down to SAJC to mit PJ for a church event, but my head was killing me, tearing me apart. Slept, from 3+, waking up several times for dunno wht reason. In my "blurness", i think i replied sms, drank water n pee-ed... hmm... waking up in the morning 6.30 and took a cab to work the next day...

Tuesday, went down to NP for training. Got schedules for IVP, so i can book my driving lessons accordingly. After training, i went home, din go eat, zzz... woke up to watch man u play psv. after tt, wnt to work as usual. after work, wnt to pick up my lenses, went home change shoe cos heel came off, a bit risky to wear them walking ard in town. wnt to mit him (him lah...) for SFS core screening of Brotherhood.

Review of Brotherhood: I liked it, but he din. was crying like hell. the plot was very pacy, thus whn the characters "grew" it seemed very fast n choppy. it also seemed like the director was trying to squeeze Band of Brothers into a 2 and a half hours movie. the cinematography was also very similar to BOB. but overall, its a good movie. teaches us one important thing, if u treasure the person close to you, nvr flare up or quarrel wif him/her. if there are misunderstandings, tok it out n clear it. cos u'll nvr know whether u'll c him/her again the nxt day, that's whn u'll regret...

Went for my first practical driving lesson today. need to work on my footwork n steering. i have bad road sense... :-(

I've been thinking a lot after the movie, dunno excately what, but it just links from one thing to another. in the end, i "settled" on 2 quotes that i've seen n heard...
"The furthest distance is that when I'm beside you, you don't even know it."
"Friends, I'd rather be. Lovers, I'd rather not. Cos lovers last for a while, while friends last forever."
With this, i'm tellin myself to be more hard hearted in love cos "friends" will definately last longer then "lovers"...

My Sassy Girl, its supposed to be a comedy... but for a third time i'm watching it, i'm still crying... the characters have a happy ending, but i dun...

Just like at ktv ystday... i was singing ting bu dao... those who has seen the mtv will know its done to tell a story. as i was singing sad songs thruout the nite, someone (i forgot whom) teased me saying, sad song again... xiang said it was a happy ending in the end... i looked at him n said, but i got sad ending...

If you're reading this, you know who you are. I really dun have the courage to tell u that I still love you a lot... I still love you deeply. I miss you, your hugs, your kisses... I miss the feeling of having you beside me... I've nvr felt so so bad b4. Guess i've fallen hard... *smack* deep hard...
Usually i'll fall into my "ideal" guy trap, where i'm distracted by this "ideal" and would treat my bf a little cold or even comtemplate leaving him... and somehow this guy just appeared. and he is more ideal then my "ideal"... But its just weird that this fella cant even distract me away from you. I admit, i was kinda attracted to him, but that attraction did not develop into any liking or feelings at all... it just made me feel guilty... guilty cos i know i still love you and that you're the only one in my heart. that attraction did nothing but pushed me more towards you...
Mayb cos i really loved you too deeply... But i guess i'll be ok... i'm wounded now but wounds will heal... i'm sad now, but sadness will fade... my heart is bleeding now, but (hopefully) soon it will stop. but it'll take a while... for how long? i have no idea... on a light note, u're the record breaker... breaking the record for the guy i cried the most for...

been feeling very tired lately...

mayb i should drink more coffee at work to keep myself awake n energetic but...

mayb i should bath faster in the mornings to set myself in pace but...

mayb i should stop feeling dead n numb whn i wake up in the mornings but...

mayb i should stop crying to sleep every nite but...

mayb i should go to bed earlier at nite but...

mayb i should stop myself thinking of Aileen Carol Wuornos n her sad life whenever i close my eyes but...

mayb i should not have watched "Monster" and feel so depressed but...

mayb i should watch some comedies but...

mayb i should just trip over some steps n land in hospital, in coma so i wun think but...

mayb i should even just fall dead but...

mayb i should just sleep now cos there's a real madrid match later at 2.30am but...

mayb i should just hug cheer bear to sleep but...

haiz... zzz...

2nd outta-sorts day. although the "impact" was less thn ystday.

reason 1? the "aunt" came this morning. sat in the cold (read: brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr) air con office enduring the monthly pains. this time round, WITHOUT my comfy hot pack (cold pack but heated up...). was toking in fanciful language to myself silently while tryin to concentrate on my work.

reason 2? no idea. mayb still feeling depressed after watching monster. was crying to sleep ystday. too sad, too heart wrenching. even thinking abt makes me cry n i almost did in the office. haiz... bo pian, who ask me to be a true blue cancerian, very extremly emotional... whn i woke up this morning, there's this kinda sadness tt overwhelmed me. just woke up feeling very sad, feeling very breathless, as if as there's a heavy load on my chest.

reason 3? nah...

time to heat up the pack... pain pain...

Totally outta sorts at work today. Staple remover rite in front of me n I din c it. Pen rite in front of me n i searched all over my table for it. was photostating something n needed my pencil, which I actually forgotten tt i took it with me all along, making a wasted trip back to my table to look for it. wrote wrong names on the wrong packs of food even with the list in front of me. even the simple, unforgettable steps of gog thru the SAP system to get a PO moving was so difficult. had to stare, look back n forth at my comp n the paper, check, double check, triple check, quadriple check n then i forgot wht to do next. even my colleagues was wondering wht was wrong with me. i wondered too. did i get out from the wrong side of bed. or was it just monday blues.

caught monster just now. diff pple would have diff POVs of the movie. for me, a straight gal, watching Charlize Theron (Aileen/ Lee) n Christina Ricci (selby) makin out should be kinda gross. it was gross the 1st time whn thy kissed. but during their 2nd time, i was drawn to lee's love for selby. she simply just never expect to fall for selby at first. somehow i think sel is the bitch who had a hand in ruining lee's life. lee loved this gal who picked her up at a bar cos she was bored n was running away from her dad. n sel later kinda did her in. in my pov, she knows lee loved her a lot, n in turn used this love to turn herself into a prosecution witness.

heart wrenching i must say. depressing rather... hearin n seeing lee's story was really heart ache. no one could have imagined gog thru all the kinda shit. raped by her dad's frd at 8, prostituted herself since 13 and had an abortion b4. if it was me n given tt life, i wont live past my abortion. i might as long just die with the baby who i dun even know who the dad was. i really sympatised with her. n trying to provide a good life for sel was all she wanted. as to y she commited the murders, it was kinda half the reason here n there. guess she got tired of being "humiliated" by men. n once she start killing one outta self defence, she couldnt stop cos it was an ez way out. an ez way out to get money n a car to move to another town for another "new" life with sel. I cried, as n i'm typing this, i'm still crying.

in the court scene, she said something which set me thinking. she scolded the jury for putting to death, a rape victim. had her dad heard her pleas n believed her whn she was 8, she wouldnt have been on death row. given the physological n mental "health" she is in, life imprisonment was cruel enuff. no one asked to be raped at 8! n the murders she did, she still had to pay for them. if the jury feels tt she has to be put to death for the murders she commited, how abt those who raped her n mulitated her? how come thy go away scot free? so is law abt who reporting who to the authorities first? i simply have no idea.

As of tmr, it'll be officially 1 month in ExxonMobil. time really flies n it only seemed like ystday i just started work.

Caught one good and one crap movie. good: 20, 30, 40. screenplay and editing is superb. 3 stories abt 3 women who dun know each other with no direct link with each other and transisting in between them was flawless! u have lee sin jie, an aspiring singer who flew to taiwan. you have liu ruo ying who is a flight attendent on duty on the plane lee sin jie took. when u follow them touching down at the airport, u find zhang ai jia returning from a trip wif her husband and daughter. aside from the opening seq, you can pratically use your hands to count if u wana find any 2 of these 3 women together in a scene. tt was how good the screenplay was. 3 award winning actresses in one movie, u can be guaranteed of superb acting. Besides having them, u have award winning liang jia hui too! cao qi tai aso acted as zhang ai jia's husband. Its not meant to be a comedy, yet there was funny moments complete with great punchlines here and there. Its so good to be able to watch such kinda taiwanese movie. wang jing n zhu yan ping can go to hell for delivering crappy stuff the last era. bring on more of these kinda "ho liao" movies!

crap: an iranian movie: blackboards. about 2 teachers wondering ard to find students. typical iranian film wif a big outline n lots of simple, draggy, sometimes stupid n dun-make-any-sense-at-all subplots. typical iranian film wif lots of loooonnnnnnnnnnng shots, "travelling" wif the character tt might make one feel nauseous. typical iranian film tt made me fell asleep just like i did during my poly film history n film study classes. typical iranian film wif irritatingly lllllllloooooooonnnnggggggg dialogue, if not monologue, maybe its just the language. typical iranian film wif not much mise-en-scene (wow, i still can spell n use this word!) except for the flowers grass trees wood (hua cao shu mu). typical iranian film tt have character B repeating wht character A says (or issit cos of the cannot-make-it translation) tt makes audiences so irrtated tt my Baby feel like slapping the character. TYPICAL BORING iranian film... spare me... can we have more iranian films like children of heaven instead?

I wana watch untold scandal... a korean remake of Les Liaisons Dangerous. reviews not bad...

50 first dates sound interesting. about drew barrymore who has short term memory loss.

i aso wana watch twilight samurai and the company, both showing at theartshouse for their "opening fest"

wana watch so many movies, no time...

acacia wasn't tt nice after all and the other movie tt was screening was cat in the hat. no wonder there were so little pple ystday at the screenings ystday. but there's something to mention abt acacia though... like almost all horror films, the cinematography n editing are the only salvage points of the film.

tired, sleepy... always happens at the end of the working week... feel like sleeping earlier tonight...

This is the 2nd+ week at work. not much OT in the past cos not much for me to do as i havent learnt tt part of the job yet... wanted to OT just now, but it was raining very heavily, thus din OT cos(by experience frm those who OT often) hardly any cabs would wana come in even "on call".

caught 2 good movies in the past week. Core screening of In America and a free invite to My Girl (thailand). a good movie will bring u thru the characters' ups n down, tears n joys and these both movies done tt.

however, after watching In America, i dun think Samantha Morton derserved an oscar nominee nod at all for best actress for her just-pass acting. but i think she got the nod cos it was a very very good role to play, with a lot of space to develop and show her acting talents, or her lack of it. she played a mother, inspite of being ill, despraetely wantin to keep her unborn child, cos she has lost one and nvr could forgive herself. her husband too... whn the elder daughter sang desperado, tears just flowed. till now, while recalling, i'm still tryin hard to hold back my tears. it was kinda like a despo call to her parents, after a year plus, to forget the pain n just let go, embracing the new life tt thy have now, w/out their brother. i think the kids who played her daughters in the film betta deserve the oscar nominee nod. anyway, the film reminded me of Angela Ashes, all abt irish families moving to the US for hope of a betta life.

My Girl, funny, sweet, romantic, n sad at the same time. the film reminded us something tt we always forget. always tell the pple ard you how u feel. lert them know your true feelings n how u feel, esp if u like/love/have a crush on them. if u have said, who knows something good might have happened. but if you did not, who knows the next time u'll c her is 20 years later at his/her wedding...

its stilll rainingggg... nice weather to sleep... hopefully i dun oversleep tmr... hopefully it stops raining tmr nite so i can OT... hehe...

i'm supposed to be sleeping right now, waking up later at 5am for the england vs portugal friendly. I tossed n turned for over an hour n i simply give up trying to zzz... hope i'll be able to tahan till 7, tt's whn the match ends...

caught House of Sand and Fog just now... definately betta thn mystic river, except, the censored part... i hate censored movies!!! well, its adapted from a novel n its abt everyone making mistakes n losing everything in the end.

story goes like this: kathy (Jennifer Connelly) was wrongly evicted. her husband left her 8 months ago n for the past 8 months she did not check her mails frequently (mistake 1). she was billed a few hundred bucks worth of business tax n she doesn't have a biz at all. but she did seek help to get the taxman off her back. n as she doesn't check her mails frequently, she din know the case wasn't quite done over wif. so, the county decided to evict her cos she did not pay the taxes. but the county did not know she did not owned a biz (mistake 2).

then she met lester (Ron Eldard) on the day of eviction. he's a sherieff, policeman kinda n they fell in love. kathy sought legal assistance to get back the house n learnt tt it was already sold to a retired colonel behrani (Ben Kingsley), an iranian immigrant. behrani wanted to sell the house for 174K, 4 times the price he bought the house for.

when lester knew abt it, he threatened (mistake 3) colonel behrani, to sell the house back to the county, so the legal pple can sue the county n get the house back for kathy. however, behrani went to the internal affairs for help n identified lester.

meanwhile, lester n kathy stayed in a friend's log cabin kinda place. he told kathy tt he needed to go away for a few hours to explain matters wif his wife. (he had stopped loving her many years ago.) while at his home, explaining matters, the internal affairs guy called lester to the office. so lester had no choice but to go n did not tell kathy abt it (mistake 4).

kathy waited for a very long time n tot tt lester was gone for good, back to his wife's arms. so she went to a kiosk, bought drinks, ciggys, n petroleum as she wanted to kill herself. after she topped up the plastic container wif petroleum she opened the boot n found a pistol. she left the petroleum at the kiosk.

she drove back to he old house, drank n tried to shoot herself but the pistol was not loaded. behrani heard her crying outside n saw wht was happening. he carried her into the house n together wif his wife, thy took care of her. meanwhile, lester got back to the lag cabin place n found kathy missing. his next instinct was to go to the house to look for her.

while lester was driving up to the house, kathy went to the bathroom to vomit due to the drinks. behrani's wife, nadi (Shohreh Aghdashloo) told kathy to take a bath to relax. in there, kathy found nadi's pills (mistake 5, nadi, knowing she is disturbed should have taken out the pills). she swallowed 20 tabs. nadi went on the check on her n found her unconcious. she forced kathy to empty her stomach. wif help from her husband, thy were trying to help kathy to the room while lester arrived. he loaded the gun n saw kathy very weak. he tot the family was trying to harm her.

he locked the family in the toilet while kathy rested in the room. the next morning, he made a deal wif behrani which would c them getting a sum of money while behrani gets to keep the house. thy drove to the county to sign papers. as he turned behrani against a wall (mistake 6), he remind him of wht he should do, behrani's son, Esmail (Jonathan Ahdout) took lester's gun for self defence (mistake 7). police arrived n shot esmail as he refused to drop the gun.

esmail died n behrani killed his wife n himself. meanwhile, lester was locked up for threats (i guess) n kathy was all alone again.

for the mistakes behrani made, he lost his life, his wife n his son n the 174K. issit a mistake for behrani wanting a good life for his family?

lester, in bid to help kathy, lost his freedom. kathy, in the quest to get back the house her dad left her, lost her bf n i guess, a bit of her "liang zhi", almost her life n her senses. issit a mistake for kathy, for being so insistent tt she wants to get back a house which her dad paid for 30 years?

this novel tells us something: in order to get something u want, u may directly or indirectly do hurt to another. n at the end of it, issit worth all that trouble?

Caught Raising Victor Vargus just now... seemed so "student-film" to me. mayb its the script, maybe its the "try-to-b-abstract-but-failed-to-do-so" thing... mayb its the camera work... cant spot flaws in lighting though... seemed a bit draggy, but kinda enjoyable cos there was an old hag... yep, old hag... irritatingly funny old hag... one line from the old hag...

*hand shows a wanking action n toks in a very mexician, latin accent* its bad... its terrib'ole', very terrib'ole' you know...

k, maybe her character is very conservative n holy, tt explains y... one very entertaining character tt spiced up the movie a little...

I spent $90 on the Last Samurai screening to get a Singapore Film Society "member-cum-pre-paid" card. y pre-paid? cos the $90 bucks entitle you to "free" screenings at least twice a month (1st n 3rd wed of the month) wif some bonus screenings thrown in now n then... n then again, not actually free cos u spent $90 on it... so i call it the pre-paid card.

Mystic River is on on wed n they're showing some shorts on thurs. can't wait... movies, movies... i'm really born into this! even studied in FSV, the ONLY film school in sg.. hehe...

I'm havin "the" lost feeling now... gog to breakdown sooner or later so i have to keep myself bz... so, here i am... Wana calll or sms to know wht he's doin but i know he's bz at a frd's place, therefore i dun wana disturb him. dun wana let him find me naggy or too "disturbing" least i get awoken from the new nice dream... so, here i am...

Caught The Last Samurai. Cried at the end of the film cos i was touched by the dignity, passion n strenght Katsumoto has. the scene now is still vividly playing in my mind... the drive he has to ride forward... the refusal to die at the end of his enemy... the enemy touched by his determination to b a samurai till his last breath, till they knelt n bow as katsumoto ended his life, the samurai way... it aso enriched my mind abt the different parts of the samurai ways. be it fully fictional or non-fictional, it did put some facts into my head. To me, Tom Cruise was just a supporting role, the real stars r the samurais.

think.. think.. betta think of things to write... i dun wana breakdown...

Exclusive... A*Mei was in town to shoot a TVC. the brand: some china ice tea tt Sun Yanzi has endorsed b4. she was so herself... Bubbly, cute, chatty n showed concern to each n everyone of us there. Seeing her again was great. The last time was at her concert... next time she's coming, its for the MTV Awards on V's day...

Editing the photos for the china trip now... Need photoshop for more control but yet to install... abt the china trip, the last few entries r still, hmm, still waitin to be churned out... kinda lazy to write... mayb i shld go back to the photos.. but its getting more n more monotonous n i dun wana breakdown! argh...

Write write.. think think... argh! blank mind now... ending quote: whn u like something too much, u'll cling on too tightly cos u dun wana lose it... but clinging on too tight, u'll still lose it... haiz... mayb i shld just go to my room n let go...

Its so tired tryin to keep busy. After I came home from My Teacher, Mr Kim (more on tt movie later), washed up, changed, I watched tv till 2.30am as usual till all my HK serials finish. Did a bit of packing and wanted tv for company again cos I was defragin my comp. No shows!!! I almost wanted to cry on the moment I was flippin away n I couldn't find any to watch. Then I settled on espn's sportscenter which keeps repeating. Wht's there to keep me occupied?

Guess I had no choice but to turn to my dear friend, Absolut. Let me introduce Absolut or Ab or more commonly know as Vodka. It's manufactured in Sweden, so says the bottle and it came back wif my dad just now at ard 10+. He bought the plain one... Absolut IS good!!! darling of the day, my hero... Jas' version of Screwdriver, Vodka + Grapefuit juice. Not like I wanted it but there's no 7-up or Ribena at home. Prefer 7-up or Ribena 100 times betta. Maybe whn I come back i shld go for Blackcurrent or Citrus... *sniggers* This is damn great, cos I'm starting to feel brain dead n sleeply!

B4 I really cannot take it n go to bed, just talk a bit on the movie. Great movie, beats any Hollywood crap thumbs down! May I add its very touching too... A teacher was posted to a rurual primary school. There he discovers what teaching is really like and goes thru happy n sad times with the entire enrollment of 5 kids. Unfortunately, the school gotta close down. The closing shots of the movies whn the credits rolled showed some B&W photos of a school. Somehow I think tt the school did exsited in Korea, characters might be fictional. Reminds me of the primary school in Pulau Ubin... Was forced to close down as there were not enuff students, just like wht's potrayed in the show. maybe will do some web search to find out...

Yankees won the series 3-1! As usual, my darling Derek Jeter made a very good play this morning... He caught the ball in the air and even b4 he landed, he made a one bounce throw to get the batter out at 1! Isn't tt so power?! *swoons* Shuai dai le... After the game, he was being interviewed. He's my fave MLB player for so long already, but its the 1st time I heard his voice! Heh! How I wish I can be like him, the best SS ard (n I'm only toking abt skills, looks toked abt seperately)... Jeter is the MLB version of Becks n Becks is the soccer version of Jeter. Good comparison eh? hehe... Benefits those reading who dunno who's Becks or Jeter... Interesting fact, both 1st names start wif "D"...

Cannot take it... gotta log in Neopets to get freebies n thn zzz... Absolut's gooooooooooodddddddddddddddd...