Danial Jaafar 🇲🇾

Ahh~just woke up. Feeling a lot better but i better get back to sleep. Before that, another quick update, just some funny stories, jokes about doctors dealing with patients LOL. Besides, it suits today's theme. =P Iain speaks frantically into the phone, 'My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart.' 'Is this her first child?' the doctor queries. 'No, you idiot.' Iain shouts. 'This is her husband.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable. Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you? Patient: I sure did - the bottle said 'keep tightly closed.' ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A mother complained to her doctor about her daughter's strange eating habits. 'All day long she lies in bed and eats ...

Hey hey~ the blog has been kind of serious. So, let's chuckle, giggle, smile sheepishly, or just laugh out loud now! =P Though, to my Muslim readers, don't laugh too hard, kurang pahala puasa. Hehehehe. Customer: “I came in here yesterday and ordered a chai tea and you guys gave me a mocha. That was not what I ordered!” Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I apologize if somehow they got messed up.” Customer: “Well, I want some sort of gift card or compensation. I am allergic to caffeine. It could have killed me!” Me: “You are allergic to caffeine but you ordered a chai tea? You do realize that chai is a black tea and highly caffeinated, right?” Customer: “I meant chocolate. I am allergic to chocolate!” (I look down at two chocolate bars in her hand.) Me: “Really?” Customer: “Oh f*** you!” (ish ish ish...dah la menipu, mencarut pulak tu. XP) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (I’m waiting in line after ordering a cheeseburge...

You know I hate those people who treat waiters or anyone in the service department like trash? But it's a different story if the persons in serving you are being rude to you. Not that I am telling you that it's okay to bash and hurl all those offensive words to them just because they are rude to you. No. As I said before, don't sink too low. Anyway, got a couple of stories shared by those who experienced serving customers, who think they were right when they were absolutely at wrong. =P ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Customer: “I need oil for my car. I need the 10-40.” Me: “I’m sorry, we’re out of that.” Customer: “Well, go get some more.” Me: “I can’t just do that. I could order some for you, and it will be here in a couple of days.” Customer: “No! Just go back there!” *points to the storage room* “Get some from the tap.” Me: “The tap?” Customer: “I know that every gas station is connected to ...

Hahaha I'm taking a break again from my studying. Check out this dumb and funny court records I came across while stumbling LOL =P You know how they say a lawyer must know how to twist, play with words ? LOL I guess too much twisting gets the better of these lawyers! Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?" Witness: "I only have one, you know." Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?" Witness: "By death." Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?" Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?" The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail. Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?" Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask." Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?" Witness: "Er...his face." Lawyer: "What was...

I am having a pun battle with my friend Dom, on Facebook. LOL It all started because of this! XD *edited* Click at the picture and you will be directed to the site where I found the picture. LOL

Steve Jobs (Apple co-founder) and Bill Gates (Microsoft founder)reminiscing the good old days. And they mean it. If the cartoon characters do grow old, probably they would get into such things in Uni/College life like others huh? =P I censored it. LOL feeling any better looking at the pic? I guess censoring it makes it not funny anymore Never lose focus of your goal. In zombies' case, BRAIN. How cool is that??? Reality check, any permanent alteration to your DNA which is beyond repair, you are most likely to die. Not turned into one of the fancy costumed superheroes. =P Clearly Pinky wasn't even looking on the road. That's how Pinky and Karla got into accident =P My mom is cool!! And I don't have to be like this guy =P

Just wanna share funny stuff I came across on the web today. I'm not sure if you guys are aware of a group, Top 20 Chuck Norris Facts. I was curious what are they but I don't want to click the "Like" button so I googled instead. =P Smart right? Huahuahauha!! Anyway, hope you guys have a good laugh. =D 20. Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night. 19. It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. 18. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. 17. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. 16. If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you ma...

Yoyoyo!! Am back with Thursday's Cool/Funny Pics! Ok, let's see what I've got so far. WTH?!?! New facial treatment? Well, not many this time. Only 3. Maybe because I still haven't got over the Horatio puns! So few days ago, I was looking for any funny videos of Horatio Caine of CSI:Miami, and sure enough, I found one which is not funny actually. It's a compilation of Horatio's one liner followed by his sunglasses pose. And the CSI:Miami's opening "Yeaah!!" LOL

I don't know how many of you guys watch CSI, CSI:Miami, but if you're a fan of CSI, you ought to like Horatio and Grissom from CSI:Miami and CSI respectively. Though Horatio is more famous among the fans because of his cool and calm demeanor. What does CSI have to do with the Thursday's Cool/Funny Pics, you ask? Well, I came across these funny Horation puns and they are so funny I thought of sharing them. Though few are not suitable to be posted up in my blog, I reckon. Anyway, here goes. Oh, for those who don't watch CSI:Miami, usually before the opening credit song is played, there will be a scene where Horatio is informed about the case the team has to work on, and he will say something legendary LOL because it will be quoted. And right after that, the opening song will play "YEAAAAHHH!!" =P

Yo! More cools and funny pics. It's Thursday and still no class. This coming Monday class will continue as usual. Anyway, have a look at the cool pics for this week. Oriental yeti. This creature caught in China has been claimed to be a new species of bear. It is hairless, has the voice of a cat and tail like a kangaroo. For now, it is known to be as a Oriental Yeti. One of the hunters said there is a local legend about a bear-man; a bear which used to be a man. Some kind of curse maybe? Good thing we have DNA test to confirm whether it is a bear-man or a new species of marsupials/bears? For all we know, it might be one of the tortured animals, hunted for furs in China.... Epic fail...in the real world or in the Star War's world. Either world, the answer is an epic fail! You'll see this not pumpkin anymore comes Halloween. Engrish. I know you guys might have seen this kind of funny pics before. You know, the direct translation of English from Malay, Mandarin, Korean, Japanes...

Or is it Funny and Cool Pic Of The Day? Because, a cool pic isn't necessarily a funny pic. And a funny pic isn't necessarily a cool pic. It can be quite nasty. =P I always thought that it is okay to take the hotel's soap, shower gel and shampoo. And I thought all Malaysians do it. Even the PM. =P LOL So, I should Laugh Out Loud when I see someone drowning? Maybe they should make the font for 'Call 911' bigger! I have to say I hate zombies. Whenever I watch The Evil Dead, Resident Evil, I feel like bashing them. But good things do come out from these zombies. For all you know, the capitalists might have adopted these unique attributes of zombies. Currently listening to old songs; Dewa (not Dewa 19) Backstreet Boys, Michael Learns To Rock and Scorpion. I guess I miss the old time. Hahahah

As I said before, Thursday is the funny pics day. Though I don't know if you guys will find them funny or not. And this time I got this video "My Mom On Facebook". It's an old video but I thought those who haven't watched it can do so =P Hahahaha Imagine us 5 siblings get this kind of comment on our walls...hahahah LOL my dad is awesome so I need not to worry. Hehehe I believe that's what we call stalker Speechless.. =P

I wasn't, I was lost, didn't feel like finishing the only assignment I have until this morning. Suddenly I feel like reborn, rejuvenated. God works in a mysterious way. Just like that, I got on my feet and been working on my assignment. By the way, just in case you guys are bored and got nothing to do, you guys might get inspirations/motivations from these pics. The girlfriend sent me these pics because she thinks I would find it funny. No, its not funny, its hilarious =P The guy who came up with these, either he got too much time in hand to get all these flies, or he got a farm of flies in his kitchen. hehehehe p/s: got other pics which can be grouped as these pics above, got them from friends and Abah. LOL