- I made a resolution to read at least 24 books this year. I'm doing well so far, having finished one book in the first week of the year.
- I am now part of a book club at work. It's basically the bunch of people that I hang out with at work and all of us are very passionate about books, movies, TV series, etc.
- After the first couple of book club meetings, the second of which was earlier today, I realized that people take books way more seriously, dissect/analyze characters in more detail, and think a lot more about the writer/setting than I do. I am partly overawed.
- I grew up in a household where radio was on almost throughout the day and the family could spend an entire day without having a long conversation. That's probably the reason why I like listening to radio/music all throughout the day and don't like conversations as much as other people seem to do.
- I am probably one of the very few people who actually have a physical radio receiver set at home.
- I love dedicating songs on the radio. Today, I dedicated a song for the boyfriend. He loved it.
- I love participating in contests on the radio, and I win regularly. I won a relatively expensive fitness band today.
- I think I remember all the men that I have been out with. At least, all the people I have had sex with.
- I think vacations are over-rated, especially those associated with travel. Maybe I'm cynical, but I think they are generally overpriced, unnecessary trips.
- Blue-light reduction and luminosity reduction apps for smartphones and computers (F.lux for iOS/Windows/OSX, Twilight for Android) should be made part of the default operating systems.
Showing posts with label lists. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lists. Show all posts
Random list of fleeting thoughts
Things that I've been doing
I have not been blogging too much lately. It's not because I don't have things to write about. Rather, I don't feel that what I write is not going to be interesting enough for reading. I guess this is very much part of the negative thought loops associated with depression. I have been reading a couple of books about depression that have opened my mind about this.
This post is about what I have been doing, apart from worrying/being depressed and working, in the past few months (from January 2014):
This post is about what I have been doing, apart from worrying/being depressed and working, in the past few months (from January 2014):
- Watching
- TV series
- Downton Abbey
- Game of Thrones (who doesn't?)
- Rome
- Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey
- SGU Stargate Universe
- Stargate SG1
- Sports/Entertainment
- Cricket (all kinds)
- Football (all of the World Cup 2014)
- Tennis (Wimbledon/French Open)
- Wrestling (WWE, TNA, and ROH)
- Movies
- Resident Evil 1, 2, 3 (2.5 out of the 5 movies)
- Stargate (1994)
- Transformers: The Age of Extinction
- Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
- The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug (can't seem to finish it)
- Reading
- Listening
- Podcasts
- Radio
- Shows:
- Books
- Ender's Game
- Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
- Learning
- History
- A History of the World Since 1300
- A Brief History of Mankind (not finished)
- Some others that I've not finished
- Astronomy
- Some that I've not finished
- Music
- Some that I've not finished
- Doing
- Music
- Learning new techniques on the guitar on YouTube (PapaStache, GuitarBlogUpdate)
- Learning some new techniques on the bass on YouTube (BassLessonsOnline, Jim Bennet, TalkingBass)
- Working on/recording new ideas
- Jamming/writing songs with a friend (in the first two months)
- Traveling (to Jodhpur)
- Going to Museums
- Going out occasionally with the BF and friends
I can't believe that I get triggered so easily - positively and negatively.
The last time I changed my blog template, I guess I was in a darker place in my life. I'm not saying that I've come out of it but I see slivers of neutrality in the way I perceive the world. So this afternoon, I was out doing strange things—strange considering that it was a Sunday where I had planned to stay in my apartment, be a hermit, and do my things (i.e., watch sport, read books, work on my guitar-playing skills, and watch TV series).
I took a shower and walked out the door for letting my maid get some time to tidy up my apartment. The only must-do thing on my list was get a strip of an antidepressant medication that I was having trouble getting. I placed a call to the pharmacy to find out that they still haven't received supplies from the company.
I didn't know what to do. I could have come back up to my apartment and sort of crawl into the bed with my Kindle or something. But I didn't. I went to the coffee shop across the road instead and read the book that I was reading, sipping two cups of americano. Strange. Americano has been by go-to-coffee for a few weeks now, after a coffee machine was installed at the office.
Being the state that I am in, I was very distracted. I went about reading like an ADD-affected individual*. Checking my phone every few seconds, zoning out to the two streams of conversations going on in the shop, and reading a few sentences of the book. I was very conscious of how distracted I was.
I must have checked my Twitter feed and something triggered the memory of a blog post in here. The post** is titled My "With Him, I'd Like To Have Sex" (WHILTHS) list". The triggers were two: a tweet from my friend about her Book-et list and my sudden remembrance of an actor from Stargate SG1 who I was horny for.
Plus, I have a few ideas for posts. After this is done, I'll start writing them. :)
*I may be an ADD-affected individual, you know.
**Coincidentally enough, this post was posted almost exactly 10 years ago - July 10th, 2004. :-O
I took a shower and walked out the door for letting my maid get some time to tidy up my apartment. The only must-do thing on my list was get a strip of an antidepressant medication that I was having trouble getting. I placed a call to the pharmacy to find out that they still haven't received supplies from the company.
I didn't know what to do. I could have come back up to my apartment and sort of crawl into the bed with my Kindle or something. But I didn't. I went to the coffee shop across the road instead and read the book that I was reading, sipping two cups of americano. Strange. Americano has been by go-to-coffee for a few weeks now, after a coffee machine was installed at the office.
Being the state that I am in, I was very distracted. I went about reading like an ADD-affected individual*. Checking my phone every few seconds, zoning out to the two streams of conversations going on in the shop, and reading a few sentences of the book. I was very conscious of how distracted I was.
I must have checked my Twitter feed and something triggered the memory of a blog post in here. The post** is titled My "With Him, I'd Like To Have Sex" (WHILTHS) list". The triggers were two: a tweet from my friend about her Book-et list and my sudden remembrance of an actor from Stargate SG1 who I was horny for.
Do you have a Book-et List? http://t.co/PWCitGgwJr
— Affy K (@hitchhikeress) July 19, 2014
The result was an instantaneous tweet.
I have to add a lot of men to my "With Him, I'd Like To Have Sex" list on http://t.co/09JXSL5I9k
— Kris Bass (@bass_man_1979) July 20, 2014
After doing a couple of other things—getting a shave and doing my groceries listening to a podcast—I came back home all excited and got on my laptop. I looked at my blog. The template that I have been using for a couple of years looked stale and sort of wannabe. I was impatient and I instinctively went for this design. I hope I would like it a couple of weeks from now.Plus, I have a few ideas for posts. After this is done, I'll start writing them. :)
*I may be an ADD-affected individual, you know.
**Coincidentally enough, this post was posted almost exactly 10 years ago - July 10th, 2004. :-O
Worry list for today
- BF’s health
- The relationship, and how my depression is ruining it
- About the next meeting with the BF and what will happen
- About all communications with him, wondering when the next argument/fight will start
- Wanting a bigger backpack to carry things around, but not wanting to disappoint him by not using the bag he bought me.
- Because of the bag situation, packing for staying over at his place, what not to miss.
- Forgetting things in different bags
- The perennial fear of losing/misplacing things while in transit
- Running out of money, long term and short term
- Getting change for 1000 rupee notes, which is what my new bank’s ATM is giving me
- Not finding the new bank’s ATMs
- How to start investing/saving
- How to sort through the company-provided health insurance papers, while realizing that the closest person in my life won’t benefit from it, thanks to Indian law
- Reading articles “positive thinking” and similar self-help articles and wondering why I can’t do any of what they say
- Feeling of being unable to finish any task apart from work (e.g., read a book, learn something, watch a movie)
- About making errors at work and causing client complaints
- About how soon I’ll leave work and when I’ll reach the place I have to get to
- About getting late for things (BF’s apartment, appointments, errands)
- Income tax return filing
- Wanting to exercise (walk/cycle) but not being unable to
- Wanting to wake up early and do something productive, but being unable to
- About how to manage watching live sports and spending time with the BF
- About medications - how to get them (pharmacy is always out of stock) and when I’ll run out of them
- About what I’ll eat in my next meal
- Running errands in general
- Communication with friends
- Impending social outings with friends
- Losing friends because of my antisocial nature
- About making friends and loved ones worry about me
- About the vast amount of things to learn but having little time for it
- Everyday commute in the rains
- Increased travel expenditure, especially suburban rail passes
- Grocery shopping - the experience and how to not forget things
Top 37 things dying people say they regret
I stumbled on this on FaceBook - a list of the top 37 things dying people say they regret.
I do most of these things right - but what I don't is what's worrying. Overwork. Stress. No travel. No taking care of health/teeth. Not cooking. Not learning a party trick.
Things that motivate me - in no particular order
- The fact that I can listen, assimilate, and play music.
- My brain.
- My ability to please/satisfy someone.
- Fast humor.
- Science.
- Sarcasm.
- Jamming with a like-minded and intuitive musician.
- Writing.
- The human frailty to be ephemerally happy with little effort.
- Kindness, in all forms.
- Complements in all forms.
- Wordplay.
- Brainpicker.org, Pulse.me, Lifehacker.com, Twitter.com
- Athletic brilliance, in all of its variations, including mainstream sports.
- Throwing and catching balls.
- Frisbees.
- Science Fiction concepts - movies and books.
- Men with accents.
- Sex.
- My resolve.
- A sexy chuckle.
- Human touch.
- A quiet distraction-free working space.
- To-do lists.
- Lists such as these.
- Cricket intelligence and humor.
- Routine.
- Clowns and clowning.
- Scents of all kinds.
- Dogs and puppies & cats and kittens
- A clean living space.
- Twinkling eyes with a smile.
- Bicycle.
- Order.
- Conflict prevention and resolution.
- Reliable gadgets.
- Commonsense.
- Honesty.
- Someone telling me, "I love you" or "I appreciate your thought/action/gesture."
- Lucid, prompt communication.
- Quiet.
- Darkness.
- Stillness in the air.
- Mumbai Winter.
- Performing music and entertaining an audience.
- Appreciation and acknowledgment for thing you do/did.
- Trees and lawns.
- Sunlight.
- A joint and/or a drink.
- Conversation.
- Second and higher layers of double entendrès.
- Home-cooked food.
- Dark chocolate.
- Education and learning.
- Efficient planning and execution.
- Reading.
- Tori Amos.
- A tactile keyboard.
- Alice In Chains.
- Vocal harmonies.
- Powerful emotions.
- The bass guitar.
- Radio, in almost all forms.
- The guitar.
- Teddy bears, figuratively.
- The drums.
- Hugging.
- The piano.
- Groove and accented rhythms.
- Eccentricity.
- The harmonica.
- Cuddling.
A Demotivating Motivational
Demotivating things in my life, in no particular order:
- The battery lives of most electronic devices.
- Your average littering, spitting, loud Indian, who is not conscious about others in public spaces.
- Expense-income imbalance.
- Miley Cyrus.
- MTV India.
- The treatment received by Julian Assange, Edward Snowden, and Chelsea Manning.
- Indian politicians.
- Random people fighting, shouting at each other, especially on the internet.
- Apartment hunting in Bandra.
- Work-life imbalance
- Indian television.
- Justin Bieber's manager's refuting stories about Bieber not retiring.
- Indian asinitude in communication.
- Commute time in Mumbai.
- My atrocious slap-pop bass technique.
- Infrastructure in India, i.e., the lack of.
- The Sharmas, Ishant in particular
- Religion and its consequences.
- My 3-year-old Android phone.
- Bureaucracy in India, for things such as passport renewal
- Mumbai traffic.
- International politics.
- Lists such as this.
- Corruption.
- Reality television.
- The lack of broadness of broadband internet.
- Andheri East.
- My mirror/webcam image.
- Inability to maintain my blog.
- Lack of collective conscience about the Earth as a planet, keeping in mind that it's just a tiny speck of dust in space.
- The Indian bowling attack.
- Communication breakdown between intelligent people who love each other.
- Edge/2G.
The disequilibrium(s)
My life can be described as a collage of various things in a state of imbalance. I would like to list them here -- in no particular order. After all, making lists is always the first step to achieve your goals. The bolder ones are winning the battle.
- Work vs. Music vs. Life
- Emotional future vs. Professional future
- Diet vs. Exercise
- Cardio vs. Weight training
- Books vs. Movies
- Economy vs. Splurging
- Blogging vs. Reading other blogs
- Online news vs. Newspaper
- Twitter vs. Blog
- Twitter vs. FaceBook
- Sedation (side effect) vs. Antipsychotics/antidepressants/antianxiety drugs
- Songwriting vs. Performing
- Performing originals vs. Performing covers
- Sleeping vs. Wakefulness
- Medicine vs. Music
- Online personals vs. Real dating
- Rice vs. Roti
- Tea vs. Coffee
- Bus vs. Train vs. Ricks vs. Cabs
- Photography vs. Phobia for it
- Social drinking vs. Teetotalling
- Scheduled vs. Haphazard lifestyle
- Sex vs. Celibacy
- Romance vs. Sex
- Family vs. Friends
- Sister vs. Parents
- Gay friends vs. Straight friends
- Time with friends vs. Time spend alone
- Computer upgrade vs. New phone
- Indoors vs. Outdoors
- Movie theaters vs. TV movies
- Eating out vs. Home-cooked food
- Happiness vs. Depression
- Luck vs. Misfortune
- Good friends vs. Bad friends
- Success vs. Failure
- Youth vs. Aging
- Wisdom vs. Carelessness
- Rehearsing vs. Performing
- Vocals vs. Bass vs. Guitar vs. Drums
- Cam sex v. Real sex
- Masturbation vs. Real sex
- Classic movies vs. Modern movies
- Classic books vs. Modern books
Time to break the silence
So many things to write about, but so little time. That's the story of my life. In a nutshell, however, I can catalog it here. Here goes...
- I'm back to being up and down. I'm going through a change of medications (antidepressants/antipsychotics/mood stabilizers etc.), perhaps I'll soon reach a stable baseline.
- Twitter is back into my life. I'm tweeting more than ever. If you are a horny gay male bird wanting to mate with me, follow me or my alter-ego Krishna.
- I'm watching plays and hanging out with friends more often.
- I've finally started having my own mini bar at home. I have started out with whisky (Royal Stag), vodka (Sminnoff classic) and beer (Kingfisher Blue). If you are hunky enough, funny enough, or hung enough, please saunter into my apartment after informing me - you might just have the quiet drink of your life.
- I have decided to not move out of my present apartment. That, ufortunately will happen next year. Or so it seems now.
- I'm planning to join a gym! Yeah, I need to get my waist from the present 31 to past 29!
- I've planning to buy an iPod. I want a gigantic storage space for music/videos/movies. iPod Classic?
- I'm making plans to upgrade (in the next 6 months or so) my existing phone (Sony Ericsson P1i) into something even better! I am looking for QWERTY smartphones preferably with huge touch screens preferably on the Android platform. The options that I'm currently considering are as follows:
- Motorola Milestone (or Droid)
- BlackBerry Curve 8520/BlackBerry Bold 9000
- SE Aspen/SE Xperia Mini Pro
- LG GW 620
- Others? (Please suggest)
In the past week or so...
- I have had big problems with internet - solved now
- I have had problems with my Clix stove - solved now
- The fuse in my kitchen blew - solved now
- Plans for applying for a US VISA are facing a bottle-neck. - unsolved
- My refrigerator is leaking (defrosting) because of lack of electricity - unsolved
- Another rat made it's appearance - unsolved
- I have been watching the animated series of X-men. It's fantastic.
- The practice sessions with Shoonyas has been less than exciting.
- I'm holding my excitement to watch Naseerudin Shan in 'A Wednesday'.
- Vinokur is coming to visit me in late November. Have to search for apartments - unsolved
- I have been able to study well.
- I have been eating better. Thanks for all the people who would sigh in relief.
Updates
I've been blogging rather helter-skelter in the last few hours... filling up the voids left behind due to business and tiredness. Since I posted them in their chronological order, it might be difficult for you to find the stream (especially if you are using a reader) of posts. Ergo, I've compiled the list of updates here. :)
- Aug 18 - The Trans-atlantic wave of depression
- Aug 18 - Cross-linking
- Aug 17 - Rat-a-hatee
- Aug 17 - Brilliante Blog Award - winner
- Aug 16 - The gig report
- Aug 16 - The Queer Azadi pride - a report
- Aug 16 - The aftermath
- Aug 16 - Two polls : the results
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