I opted for NUH Orthopaedics SIP with much reluctance, considering it a lesser evil compared to SGH Orthopaedics. Prior to starting the posting, I thought to myself how nice it would be to be allocated to Prof G's team, remembering how awesome his Year 3 lectures/teachings were. I had half a mind to email the admin staff to request for the particular placement, but stopped short of drafting the email, trusting that God will provide. It was on the first day of our posting that Prof G asked M who was standing next to me, who is Glorijoy? and in a state of half surprise, I said, that's me Prof. I remember his look of sian-ness mixed with embarrassment in asking that question in my face, and possible sian-ness that his SIP was a girl who was unlikely to be very enthusiastic in orthopaedics.
Week 1 in SIP was an accelerated transit from a noob M3 observer in clinic, to learning how to sound credible in giving neck care back care advice, and moving on to running my own clinic room adjacent to HO/MO rooms on the day Prof had 90 patients scheduled for the entire clinic day. Not much HO-work then, and had the chance to revise orthopaedic principles. I was also blessed with a damn steady MO and HO, who knew how to work efficiently without cutting corners. Tired, but happy.
Week 2 was when we were rotated to doing ward work - changes, letters, memos, discharges, drains etc. It was then that I realized what a haphazard person I was/am. When given instructions, I can almost certainly follow with good standard. When left to my own devices, I often find myself spending lots of time trying to get organized and not mixing up patient details/changes. I find that the only reason I am not getting into hot soup is because there are people who are trailing behind me checking my work and making up for my inadequacies. I wonder if one day I will ever become my own master.
It is now week 3, and in reflecting on the past two weeks, I ask myself - have I had fun? Most certainly. Surprisingly even, since I never ever enjoyed surgery. These 2 weeks reminded me of the time I considered pursuing Orthopaedics during my posting in year 3 and how I liked the idea of clean surgeries. Straightforward, no strings attached. No need for TLC or sayanging - just see, fix and send to rehab. Surgeons are a different bunch compared to the physicians. A lot more laid back, fun loving, not so uptight. They know how to relax, talk crap and let loose when the time comes. Always fun to hang out and go for an early breakfast on a rare day without teaching.
I also ask myself, have I learnt much? Sure. I think I have managed to patch up the gaps in learning that I didn't manage to in Medicine SIP. I guess the learning curve is always steep when your knowledge in surgery is chui max. Still long way to go, but learning nonetheless.
The final question that I ask myself is, am I satisfied? On reflection, an honest answer would be no. No, because in the midst of seeing 90 patients in clinic, running from ward to ward to track changes, I can barely remember the names of a handful of patients. There is perhaps only 1 patient who knows my name, and that patient is to be transferred to another team. There has been no sense of ownership. All I am doing is, hello Auntie, I need to take out this tube now! or Hello Uncle, the bone is broken ah, need to go operation to repair. And then I shuttle off to do admin scud work and/or pull out a drain in 5 mins. And then I never see them again. Nothing quite traditionally doctor-y about that I guess.
In the midst of lots of free food, nice seniors and good fellow SIPs, God has been truly gracious. In seeing me through presenting cases in front of The Scary as well as having weekends off (after giving the doe-eyed pitiful look on a Friday evening post-clinics at 7:30pm post call). Two more weeks to go, I want to make it count.